I’ve had better luck using firmer, less juicy apples for apple slaw - things like Granny Smith, Pink Lady, or even Braeburn. They hold up a lot better to a fine julienne and don’t turn watery as fast, especially when you’re not hand-cutting.
Also, if the julienne tool is doing most of the work (no judgment - I’m in the same boat), sometimes switching to a sharp Y-style peeler for thin strips instead of true matchsticks helps keep the texture lighter and more consistent. I’ve been using something along the lines of this one https://www.allpointsfps.com/75932-6-one-half-in-y-peeler-winco/ .
Lately, and it’s been surprisingly useful for slaw-style cuts without crushing softer fruit.
As for the kids and pulled pork - I’ve noticed the same thing. A lot of pre-teens seem to prefer simpler, cleaner flavors and textures, while pulled pork (especially if it’s smoky or sauced) reads as “too much” for them. More for the adults, I guess.