I have a little bit of advice on playing it. You may first think it's a bit off-topic, but please understand.
One of the central themes of the main storyline (and, by extension, the aesthetics of the entire game) is, as
puts it, facing the question "What if it's impossible to know anything for sure?".
To achieve this, creators of the game went to great lengths to provide this feeling - the feeling that you have to act with scarce information now and your actions will have consequences you will never know. And authors worked very hard to give you the feeling of uncertainty even after the game ends. So that you would forever be uncertain whether this or that choice you made have changed the story, and how. You can imagine how very hard it was for creators — to give you this feeling despite you (a player) knowing that there can't really be infinite possibilities in a computer game.
With this post, you are trying to undo what creators of the game did for you. You created this post because of your inner struggle, because facing the question I mentioned makes you uneasy. It is painful to face it, it causes psychological and existential pain. Observe how it works in your soul. Because observing it working in your own soul is part of the game story. Only then you would understand what
was telling you. Only by experiencing it yourself, by reflecting upon it.
If you are trying to use saves or internet forums to figure out what could have happened, had you made different decisions — you are missing on a big chunk of experience this game strove to offer you. I'm not saying it is true for other games, but this very game is built around precisely this theme, and you're denying it. Give it a chance, or, at least, give it some time.
Maybe I should post it as a separate thread.