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Aishur-Rim-Nisheshu

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About Aishur-Rim-Nisheshu

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    (3) Conjurer
    (3) Conjurer
  1. English Outrage At German Aggression. Vows Solidarity with France The Times, Mar 1902 Disappointment and outrage summed up the feelings in the House of Commons today as news of a second (and successful) German invasion of France reached these shores. Whereas the Liberals and Laborites continued their hapless plead for calm and world peace, the bullish Tories have revealed that the government has been in contact with the French for quite some time now and the latest deployment of BEF A and BEF B to the continent, as well as the presence of the Blue Squadron in the English Channel are some measures carried out by the government in consultation with the French. "Blast those damn Huns," Screamed Aishur Aishur, Tory MP for Nowhereshire (pop: 45) and one of the most vocal supporter of the government's policy "Now a good bottle of Beaujolais is going to skyrocket! How am I going to pay for my daughter's wedding luncheon? This crime will not go unpunished!"
  2. Hrmpff! Surely not. I have every reason to believe that the Queen's finest will rise to the occasion and dispense law and order with typical devilish cunningness and regal pomp. The British way of course. I have reading too much Warren Ellis...
  3. Someone attacking the Olympics just tends to piss everyone of. Unless your some sort of nihilsist its not worth it. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Oh come on, I'm just playing devil's advocate here (NY! NY!). Unless of course you are a hardcore olympics fan, then I apologise. But if so, why the yawn in the first place?
  4. Was New York eliminated early in the selection? Shame. and I thought that by invoking 9/11, they would get enough sympathy.
  5. Woe be to London if any **** ups happen. S'pore was the venue of the IOC convention. Fricking area where the big shots were, was converted into a fortress.
  6. As if I give a damn about London. As if I give a damn about the olympics.
  7. The Smiths - Stop Me if You Think You've heard This One Before
  8. The Imperial Chancellory of, The Austrian Empire and the Kingdom of Hungary My fellow countrymen: by the power vested in me by my office as Imperial Chancellor of the Austrian Empire, Prime Minister of the Kingdom of Hungary and First Imperial Minister to his Majesty, Emperor Karl I, I hereby make this statement: On the twenty-nineth of April in the one thousandth nine hundreth and first year of our Lord, without any claims presented to our great government, without any declaration based on legal grounds, the forces of Imperial Russia attacked and invaded our northwestern province of Galicia. As of now a state of war exists between Austria-Hungary and Russia. This unheard of attack upon our country is perfidy unparalleled in the history of civilized nations. The invasion of our beloved homeland was perpetrated despite the very fact Austria-Empire has not in anyway antagonized or sought to put at risk the security of our Russian aggressors. Whatever excuses or reasons put forth by the Russian government will ultimately be proven false and malicous. Such a infamous deed will be recorded in the annals of time-trusted history as proof of the barbariansm and uncivilization of the government of Tzar Enderwiggin. Whereas this war was forced upon us and it is neither deserved nor vindicated, it is the very intention of this imperial administration to pursue it to the very end with nothing more than total victory for our great Empire as the sacred mission. Nothing less than the absolute destruction of the enemy's ability and will to wage wars of aggression is acceptable. Nevertheless I must emphasize that our great struggle is against the corrupted Russian Government and not against the Russian people whom we are well aware of, are living in despairing states of persecution and selfdom. Our great crusade to repel and destroy the enemy will also be a herald of emanicipation of the innocent Russian people who yearn for our intervention. The fall of Galicia is a grevious setback for the Empire, but the hearts of our people still burn strong and the strength of our armies are undiminished. Boldly we shall resist whatever the enemy throws at us as long as there is hope for the salvation of the entire western world. Be stout hearted for the days to come for this war shall be long and taxing. But I have every faith that you will all rise to the occasion and perform what is needed of you for your great Empire. We stand not alone for we have allies and they are very great and they will aid us in their own way for the days to come. Good Luck! And may the Almighty bless us as we commence this noble undertaking. Count Aishur Rimscirz Imperial Chancellor The Austrian Empire and the kingdom of Hungary
  9. WAR! Russia Invades Austrian Galicia By Edward Harrington for The Times, 1 May 1901 0545hrs, Vienna In an extraordinary press conference held at the Imperial War Ministry this morning at a quarter pass one, ministrial spokesman Colonel Friedrich von Hollenstein annouced that Austria-Hungary and Russia are now in a state of war. The colonel then revealed that on the night of the twenty-ninth of last month, elements of the Russian Army which has since been identified as the First Army of Holy Russia (1AHR) crossed the Austro-Russian border and entered Galicia without provocation. It is understood that the said invading army is still in occupation of that northwestern province. No explanation was given on why the annoucement was only made two days after the preemptive attack. At about three o'clock on this same day, the Imperial Foreign Ministry has annouced that the Russian Ambassador has requested for his passport and clearance papers. This is an age-old sign of the commencement of war. So far all attempts to raise Galicia by wired means have failed leading us to suspect that Russian saboteurs have done their work in keeping Galicia in a communications blackout. The Times will continue to monitor the situation and keep the world abreast with the latest developments.
  10. Is Europe On the Verge of War? By Miklos Gyorgy Ladanyi for the Sonntagsbl
  11. The Emperor is Dead! By Albercht Konrad von Jurreg for the Wiener Allgemeine Zeitung, 27 Apr 1901 2300 hrs, Vienna (For immediate release) It is with greatest of sorrows in our hearts and minds that we; the most respectable publisher in the Empire regretfully report that his majesty the Emperor has passed away. The most beloved Emperor Franz Josef was seventy-one. The annoucement of his majesty's passing came from the Imperial Office of the Keeper of the Privy Seal at a half past ten on the same evening as this special report. The official statement from Imperial Keeper Prinz Helmuth Otto Frederich von Thayerin states that the Emperor died peacefully of old age. However twelve minutes later in an interview with the Wiener Allgemeine Zeitung, we bring you the sensational news that Imperial Physician Dr Lothar Wattau who treated the Emperor said that his majesty died of vodka poisoning. So far neither Prinz Thayerin's office nor the Imperial Palace press office has made a respond to the good doctor's claims. "Excess alcohol supresses the nerves and causes seizures and irratic breathing and Vodka is one of the greatest source of strong distilled alcohol," explained Dr. Wattau. He went on to disclose, "When his Majesty was taken to the Imperial Infirmary, he was still clenching onto an empty bottle of fine vodka that I recognize was sent by the tsar. I know it's fine vodka because the Emperor said so! He kept on slurring 'izzzzaaaa fuuuuuuuunnnnggg borrrrrrr urrrr vvoooookkkieeeee! Berrrriii fuunnnnnggggg!" Dr Wattau whom also identified himself with the ultra-conservatives had this final words to add, "I think the Russkies are up to no good. This evil but very fine bottle of Vodka is obviously a plot to assassinate our beloved Emperor and it worked. We must fight back now!"
  12. Vienna Expresses Doubt By Wilhelm Freyburg for The Times, 25 Apr 1901 1645 hrs, Vienna The Empire has expressed its doubt on the authenticity of what is supposed to be leaked war plans from the United states of America as well as President Roosevelt's claims on impending full-scale war in Europe. In a special press conference from the Imperial Foreign Ministry, Special Representative Juz Hayadi stated that the Empire is surprised that the leader of the world's leading democracy could come out with such fallible statements in public. He said, "Such irresponsible words are the causes of undesirable tension and its consequences. The Empire has no idea why President Roosevelt would make such wildly fantastic claims. This issue smacks highly of malice and mischief. We do not look upon such words kindly." Mr Hayadi also stated that the American Ambassador to Vienna would be summoned immediately to the Ministry to explain the intents of his country.
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