Alendra Posted April 29, 2021 Posted April 29, 2021 (edited) So I posted the profile and background I wrote in the The Outer Worlds: Stories (Spoiler Warning!) subforum, as I thought the "stories" part of the forum's title was suitable. But then I realized that might have been a mistake since there are not any spoilers in it, and posting it in a forum in which there are posts with spoilers might mean that not a lot of people see it. I'd love to get critique and thoughts on my character, so I'm reposting it here, which I hope is okay. Let me know if it's not okay, or if I need to delete the other one. Anyway, I'd love some comments! Basic information Name: Sarah Eleana Yardeen.Nom de guerre: Brightfall.Aliases: Sarah Brightfall, Captain Alex Hawthorne.Birthplace: London, England.Birth date: 2270.Age: 15.Spoken languages: English, Arabic, Hebrew, Dutch.Religion: None.Favourite poem: Invictus.Family: Ashraf Medad Yardeen (father, deceased), Liesbeth Saskia Yardeen (mother, née Kroes, deceased), Patrick Aalbrecht Yardeen (older brother, in hibernation on the Hope), Yasmin Miriam Yardeen (older sister, deceased).Moral alignment: Neutral Good. Current weaponsDead-Eye Assault Rifle Mk III with Whisper Quiet Muzzler, Mag-Num magazine and Exact-O-Sight. Bolter Pistol 3.0 with FunTimes Barrel, Gyro Sight and Mag-Num magazine.Officer's Spine Titanium with Mr. Power plasma damage modification and SpeedGrip handle wrap. Security Blade with telescoping handle. Background Sarah was born in London, England to a Palestinian father and a Dutch mother. As a young child growing up, Sarah had often looked up at the starlit night sky. She had always dreamed of visiting them, of travelling to distant star systems and boldly setting foot on unfamiliar worlds. Her parents, who were both scientists, had often told their children that the stars in the sky were indeed beautiful but that none could match the brightness of Sarah and her siblings. They said their children were as if the greatest stars had fallen to Earth and become human. Sarah took it to heart. When she was eight years old, tragedy struck. One of the major corporations had decided to “volunteer” Sarah’s parents for indentured service, as they desired their scientific talent for their projects. When the corporation’s requisitions team arrived to collect, Sarah’s older sister Yasmin attempted to resist and was shot dead on the spot by the corporate soldiers without a second thought. Yasmin bought time for Sarah to escape, but her parents and brother were taken. Now alone in the world, confused and filled with hate towards the corporations and rage at the injustice that had happened, Sarah felt lost. After a year on the streets, she had just about given up on life when she was approached by a woman who claimed to represent a group dedicated to ending the corporate tyranny. The gaping hole in Sarah’s childish heart was filled with tales of honor and justice. Assurances of vengeance. It sounded like a new chance at life…one with purpose. Sarah soon found out that the group was far more organized and well-funded than she had initially believed. They functioned like an elite military special forces battalion, one that was vehemently anti-corporate. The battalion was led by a man who called himself Jack Harper, though this was likely an alias; all that anyone knew is that he was an illusive man. The rebel group had no qualms about using children, and Sarah began training immediately. She had inherited her parents prodigal intellect, and her heightened but still growing mental faculties began the process of being forged for purposes of disciplined violence. Her training progressed quickly, in body and mind. Her intelligence, her reflexes, her muscles, her physical senses; sight, smell, hearing - every fibre of her being, everything within her that could have been directed towards brighter endeavours - was corrupted and fine-tuned towards one purpose: killing. After five years of this training, at the age of fourteen, she was slated to join the rebel group’s elite assassination unit after completing one final mission. The mission was assigned to her by the woman who had recruited her, and it was to assassinate two of the leading scientists of a very specific corporation; the corporation whose actions had set Sarah down this path. She leapt at the chance to finally enact a measure of the vengeance that had been promised. Strangely, she was given no names; only a general physical description of her targets and their exact and when they would be there. Sarah knew this to be unusual, but she was so consumed by vengeful purpose that she never questioned who her targets were. Not even when she was right upon them and realized there was something strongly familiar about them. She still did not hesitate. It was only when their blood covered her hands and she looked upon their faces for the first time that Sarah recognized them. Her parents. She slumped down onto the floor. Her body was still, her face and eyes frozen in a contorted visage of pain and horror of indescribable magnitude. The rebel group had known exactly who her targets were, and they had intentionally kept it from her. They were always meticulous with gathering information; during training, Sarah had been assigned to gather information about other targets herself. Slowly but surely, the brainwashing and mental conditioning that had been instilled in her by the rebel group began to crumble and lose its hold. She remained on the floor when the corporate security team arrived, and she did not even look up when the grunts raised their weapons to put her out of her misery. The only reason she lived to see another day was because the corporate commander ordered them to capture her alive for interrogation. Sarah didn’t respond to any of their questions for weeks. It was only when they told her that her older brother was still alive and that he had been granted a place on the Hope colony ship that she began to speak, asking to see her brother before he left, but the only response was that he refused to see her due to what she had done to their parents. In solemn acceptance of this, she began to cooperate anyway and provided information on the rebel group to the corporation. She had two other, final requests. The first was that she would be granted a place on the Hope colony ship alongside her brother. The second request was that they let her join them in taking down the rebel group. When they stormed the facility where Sarah had grown up and trained, she personally cornered the woman who had recruited her, trained her and assigned her the mission to unknowingly kill her parents. The screams heard from that room reportedly caused visible unease in the corporate troopers, their faces going pale as winter snow. After the screams stopped, there were a few moments of silence before Sarah opened the door and walked out covered in blood that was not hers. Those possessed of weak stomachs threw up in their helmets at the sight inside. Some passed out. The illusive man known as Jack Harper was never caught. To Sarah’s surprise, the corporation granted her first request as well and granted her a place on the Hope. But the silent look in their eyes or the fact that they all consistently avoided looking into her own told her that they simply wanted her gone, but were too afraid to try to kill her. As Sarah stepped into the hibernation pod aboard the colony ship known as UDL-002 the Hope and closed her eyes, her final thoughts before everything went dark was of her family. Not how they had been torn apart by the corporations or Sarah herself, but the memories she had of them from when she was a child, before everything had happened. She remembered how her parents had loved her and her siblings. She remembered how she, together with her family, had looked up at the stars and wondered what it would be like to go there. Now, despite everything that had happened, she was going to find out. Name etymology Yardeen: Sarah’s family name. Derived from the Hebrew word Yarden ( ירדן ) meaning “one who descends”. Combined with Eleana, it forms the basis of Brightfall, Sarah’s nom de guerre. It is also a reference to Yalena “Dutch” Yardeen of Killjoys. Eleana: ( Arabic: إليانا ) Sarah’s middle name. According to Wikipedia, the name is translated in Arabic as “the Bright”. Ashraf: ( Arabic: أشرف ) The name of Sarah’s father. Means "most honorable one" or "very noble". Medad: Ashraf’s middle name. Hebrew word with the meaning of friendship and love. It’s also a pun/dad joke. Me, dad. Image gallery Edited May 13, 2021 by Alendra
Alendra Posted May 19, 2021 Author Posted May 19, 2021 13 hours ago, asnjas said: Wow Thanks for reading!
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