Sir Stonks, the Grandiloquent Gentleman

[Staehrminator]

Why hello there. The name's Gaylor Stonks. Let me introduce myself:

Very High Charm
Very High Intelligence
High Perception
Average Dexterity
Low Strength
Low Temperament 

Tier 1 Perks: The Negotiator, High Maintenance, Strider, Cheetah, Slow the World, Quick and the Dead.
Tier 2 Perks: Snake Oil Salesman, Soliloquy, Scanner, The Reaper.
Tier 3 Perk: Revenge.
Flaw: Far-sighted.

Main skills: Dialogue, Science.

Secondary skills: Long Guns, Lockpick, Hack, Determination.

Not a single point in those awfully primitive Melee or Defense skills, thank you very much. Gaylor is a man of class, and a shameless opportunist to boot. He speaks with the refined elegance of a bohemian who's never had to work a day in his life, instead having spent his time lazily attending university lectures on particle physics and economic theory while talking his fellow students' ear off. Knowledge and wealth, the two facets of power.

That's not to say Gaylor can't get his hands a little dirty now and then. He is a fair hand with a lockpick and knows his way around computers. It's just that he prefers to finger-wag and ass-cover his way out of any unpleasantries, letting his loyal companions pick up the slack instead. And if push does comes to shove, Gaylor's honeyed words are backed with nuclear weapons.

It started out as a regular Plasma Rifle that he reappropriated from a cupboard in the Cannery. The astute observer may note that instead of superheated plasma it launches globs of concentrated acid, thanks to a Mag2Melt modification he bought at a huge discount. The weapon's high base damage lends itself well to the armor-piercing qualities of the Corrosive effect, and to top it off it has been outfitted with an ExactoSight which makes this synergy even more potent.

The result is a reliable big iron that blows a large, smoking hole in whatever you point it at. In Gaylor's hands it becomes even more formidable due to his beefy Science skill, his keen eye for critical hits and weak spots, and his borderline supernatural time dilation ability. This removes the need for unbecoming sneak attacks or fancy tactical positioning. Even on Supernova difficulty Gaylor can just stand still and vaporize his enemies one by one, and run like the wind to recharge his meter while his companions mop up any remaining stragglers.

Sure, the lack of regenerating health hurts his economy, and his gun is neither cheap to reload nor tinker with, but money is as air to Gaylor. He can rub two bit cartridges together and create a third. This lets him deck out his posse in the best gear available, keeping them safe as he slithers and slips his way around the galaxy to make even more money for himself. If only he could romance that absolute daddy of a Vicar his life would be perfect, but that's what DLCs are for.

When you think quality of life, think Stonks. Gaylor Stonks.

Edited December 19, 2019 by Staehrminator