I think you're overvaluing CON. You can lower it and not have any problems, I suspect.
Good to know! CON was the one thing I was unsure about (hence why I refrained from mentioning it in stat explanations). I suspected it wouldn't hurt too much to lower it, but feels weird to go low CON on a tank to me. That said, if I can get it down using console commands or an IE mod equivalent I'd be happy to spread those points a bit
POE1 had respec so I'm pretty sure you can just grab a respec at any time from an Inn, and redistribute your points there.
I mean, unless they changed it...
You can't respec attributes in Deadfire which is kind of lame. You can use the console command though, but it disables achievements.