There's always need of a good balance of story, action, and interaction between the player and npcs/companions. If you need to empty your head and just bash, it's better to chose an action/adventure game, a hack and slash or a shooter. Real RPGs are meant to immerse you. You gotta feel your character, feel your companions - love or hate them.
As a female old school player, these are the best games in my opinion. There is nothing like a good party banter (Valen and Deekin anyone?), drama, fun, complications etc. Such games are a story that lets you the player participate - it is suppose to move you, to anger you, to make you laugh, or even cry. I respect even those characters that I have hated in games, because they have succeeded to extract a reaction from me - means the game is a success.
Sexuality is good, especially along with a good text lines. No need to spam us with to much graphics (yep DAO's cut scenes are well... usually skipped after the first time), but at the same time it's fine to find a good balance. A bit of vulgarity, a bit of respect, but mostly, mostly interaction between the player and his friends/foes. Romances in games are very important in my opinion. The character I play, whether it is a female or a male, belongs to that universe and I like to have my characters evolve and experience as many things that suit me - because I learn from them every time. Every experience even in a video game, is a level up for the one who opens his mind to learn or see new things.