Unable to host/join multiplayer on steam

[gazingforstars]

Haven't been able to join or host a multiplayer game since launch.  Was hoping with update 0.1.3 I'd be able to do something with multiplayer, but haven't had any luck at all.

I've uninstalled and reinstalled both the game and xbox app individually thrice.
I've verified game file integrity each time.
I've unlinked and re-linked my xbox account to my steam account thrice.
Anytime I try to join a multiplayer game, I get the following error.

If I try to host a game, it infinitely creates a lobby.  The one time I was able to actually host a game, it took 30 minutes to make the lobby, by which point I'd given up the ghost on playing that evening.

I've not been given the option to login to a connected xbox account upon login, it just logs into steam as you'd expect.  Subsequently, I'm unable to enable crossplay to attempt hosting/joining that way.
I get the following error when I try to enable crossplay.

At current there's only 2 things I can think would be causing the problem:
1) the xbox app and steam aren't communicating
2) I have to update my goddamn BIOS in order to make the game run.

"Why would you have to update your BIOS?"  you ask?  That'd be on account of this lovely little popup I get anytime I launch the game

I'm incredibly loathe to update my BIOS, considering the fact that this computer is less than 6 months old and updating BIOS is a task and a half that could brick my motherboard if something goes wrong.
So if there's some other fix that anyone might have that doesn't involve me potentially bricking my motherboard, I would be most appreciative.