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Things every self-respecting man over 30 should have...


Raithe

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Carrying around two devices that show me the time is inefficient and inefficiency has no place in the life of a self respecting man.

Well that line was funnier than anything in the article. Checking a watch is easier for me than fishing my cellphone out of my pocket.

 

Undershirts can be handy in summer, if you're walking to work or just around, having sweat soak through your shirt isn't that great. Granted, even the undershirt can be defeated if it's that hot out.

Why has elegance found so little following? Elegance has the disadvantage that hard work is needed to achieve it and a good education to appreciate it. - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra

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Did you not note the "I'm both curious and amused at what people think should be added to this list or removed from it." aspect to my post?

 

It's kind of like the list someone's put together based on half a dozen of the last few years "charming, persuasive, leading men on tv" from things like the Mentalist, White  Collar, and the rest of the like.

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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I use a watch because it is more discrete than hauling my phone out to check the time. Not to mention I can do it while working with both hands. PLUS I can time things on my watch.

"It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"."

             -Elwood Blues

 

tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.

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What a load of bollocks.

 

Suits? I would have thought it aspirational never to want to wear one.

 

I have a Gerber, some duct tape, a baseball bat for home defence, a Le Creuset cast-iron skillet, a wine-cellar that would make Napoleon blush and an epic collection of artisan p0rn.

 

Oh, and a passport with GDR stamp circa 1989 on it.

 

And a Zippo. Don't forget the Zippo. I'm a Londoner, I've got a car that is covered in dents (and is one of the reasons I need duct-tape) and no sane person would ever steal it.

 

Basically, I am a rampant hetero-tiger alpha male and the person who authored that list is a Metrosexual ****.

Edited by Monte Carlo
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I use a watch because it is more discrete than hauling my phone out to check the time. Not to mention I can do it while working with both hands. PLUS I can time things on my watch.

And they can work as impromptu dusters...well...not that effective I'd imagine.

Why has elegance found so little following? Elegance has the disadvantage that hard work is needed to achieve it and a good education to appreciate it. - Edsger Wybe Dijkstra

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Or they can be force fed to lazy journalists.

 

But point taken, Raithe. I missed that bit about you finding the list amusing.

"It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"."

             -Elwood Blues

 

tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.

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I use a watch because it is more discrete than hauling my phone out to check the time. Not to mention I can do it while working with both hands. PLUS I can time things on my watch.

 

Mmh, apart from whole "only jewelry a man should wear" aspect, it's basically the only way to know the time while in court.

You're a cheery wee bugger, Nep. Have I ever said that?

ahyes.gifReapercussionsahyes.gif

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I use a watch because it is more discrete than hauling my phone out to check the time. Not to mention I can do it while working with both hands. PLUS I can time things on my watch.

 

Mmh, apart from whole "only jewelry a man should wear" aspect, it's basically the only way to know the time while in court.

 

 

Heh, I managed to get through my last few years of secondary school wearing a waistcoat and pocket watch without getting into any fights.. :shifty:

"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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After an exhaustive check I realised I have everything on that list, except for the self respect in the title, if that's not irony then I don't know what is.

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Quite an experience to live in misery isn't it? That's what it is to be married with children.

I've seen things you people can't even imagine. Pearly Kings glittering on the Elephant and Castle, Morris Men dancing 'til the last light of midsummer. I watched Druid fires burning in the ruins of Stonehenge, and Yorkshiremen gurning for prizes. All these things will be lost in time, like alopecia on a skinhead. Time for tiffin.

 

Tea for the teapot!

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Today I learned I'm a metrosexual jippie..

It's okay, we have always known.

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I'd say the answer to that question is kind of like the answer to "who's the sucker in this poker game?"*

 

*If you can't tell, it's you. ;)

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1. A tailored black suit

 

- Own

 

2. Black dress shoes

 

- Own

 

3. Brown dress shoes

 

- Own

 

4. Stocks

 

- Own

 

5. A tool kit

 

- Own

 

6. A nice wallet

 

- Own

 

7. Cologne, NOT BODY SPRAY

 

- Own

 

8. A watch

 

- Own

 

9. A proper bed with proper bedding

 

- Own

 

10. A flashlight

 

- Own

 

11. Duct tape

 

- Own

 

12. A weekend bag

 

- What is this?

 

13. Proper glassware

 

- Own

 

14. Grooming kit

 

- Own

 

15. Double-hinged wine key

 

- What is this?

 

16. Multiple towels

 

- Own

 

17. A chef’s knife

 

- Own

 

18. A passport

 

- Own

 

19. A flask

 

- I'm not a hobo

 

20. Sewing kit

 

- I ask my mom for help

 

21. An umbrella

 

- I own two

 

22. Buy an ironing board, and an iron.

 

- Own

 

23. Jumper cables

 

- I'm a danger in traffic

 

24. Undershirts

 

- Own

 

25. Playing cards

 

- Own

 

26. A lint roller

 

- Own

 

27. A leatherman

 

- What?

 

28. Sunglasses

 

- The sun needs protection from me

 

29. A record player

 

- Nope

 

30. Football/soccer ball/basketball, etc.

 

- Own

 

31. A French press

 

- Le what?

 

32. Good socks

 

- Own

 

33. Good underwear

 

- Own

 

34. A cast-iron skillet

 

- Own

 

35. Multiple sheet sets

 

- Own

 

36. A bar set

 

- Nope

 

37. Matching dishes

 

- Own

 

38. A decent car

 

- I'm a danger in traffic

 

39. A solid book collection

 

- I go to the library

 

40. A decent bottle of booze

 

- Own more than I should.

 
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I remember a friend once showed me an article about "how to be a real man".

 

The first thing was something like, "a real man doesn't care what anyone thinks"

 

I always thought that was funny that, the guy writing it seemed to believe that yet expected every man in his audience would care about *his* advice.

 

 

Wonder what this person's list of what self-respecting women should have would be.

 

 


Point was that I was a little disappointed that the average US citizen apparently didn't "get out" more. It's super important to see the rest of the world and not just your local country/culture.. Even if USA is pretty big - you guys are important, you should be well traveled. I would be disappointed at a European never leaving Europe too.

 

 

The average US citizen probably can't afford many trips. Most people I know have only been to Canada and even then only because you can drive there.

Edited by Dawn Quixotic
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1. A tailored black suit

 

- Nope

 

2. Black dress shoes

 

- nope

 

3. Brown dress shoes

 

- nope

 

4. Stocks

 

- nope

 

5. A tool kit

 

- Own

 

6. A nice wallet

 

- Own

 

7. Cologne, NOT BODY SPRAY

 

- nope

 

8. A watch

 

- nope

 

9. A proper bed with proper bedding

 

- Own

 

10. A flashlight

 

- Own

 

11. Duct tape

 

- Own

 

12. A weekend bag

 

- nope

 

13. Proper glassware

 

- nope

 

14. Grooming kit

 

- does a set of electric hair clippers count?

 

15. Double-hinged wine key

 

- What is this? Also, wine is gross unless its icewine, then its minimum 70 bucks a bottle and who can afford that?

 

16. Multiple towels

 

- Own, dont use.

 

17. A chef’s knife

 

- Own

 

18. A passport

 

- expired for 6 years

 

19. A flask

 

- nope

 

20. Sewing kit

 

- nope

 

21. An umbrella

 

- broken, but yes

 

22. Buy an ironing board, and an iron.

 

- why would I iron Tshirts?

 

23. Jumper cables

 

- nope

 

24. Undershirts

 

- nope

 

25. Playing cards

 

- nope

 

26. A lint roller

 

- nope

 

27. A leatherman

 

- nope

 

28. Sunglasses

 

- expensive ones. Splurged and paid 30 bucks

 

29. A record player

 

- Nope

 

30. Football/soccer ball/basketball, etc.

 

- nope

 

31. A French press

 

- nope

 

32. Good socks

 

- Own

 

33. Good underwear

 

- Own

 

34. A cast-iron skillet

 

- nope

 

35. Multiple sheet sets

 

- nope

 

36. A bar set

 

- Nope

 

37. Matching dishes

 

- nope

 

38. A decent car

 

- Mazda 5

 

39. A solid book collection

 

- nothing in hardcover

 

40. A decent bottle of booze

 

- does Malibu count?

 

Edited by Oerwinde
The area between the balls and the butt is a hotbed of terrorist activity.

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What kind of ****ing nutbag mentions umbrellas, but no towels?

 

What kind of man cares about umbrellas? As my _sister_ is apt to point out: humans ain't made of sugar.

"It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"."

             -Elwood Blues

 

tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.

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What kind of ****ing nutbag mentions umbrellas, but no towels?

 

What kind of man cares about umbrellas? As my _sister_ is apt to point out: humans ain't made of sugar.

U wot m8? It does mention towels.

 

I'll have you know that owning umbrellas is a very manly thing.

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Heh. For something I threw on here for the random amusement, I was not expecting it to run to 3 pages and a few hundred views...

"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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"Point was that I was a little disappointed that the average US citizen apparently didn't "get out" more. It's super important to see the rest of the world and not just your local country/culture.. Even if USA is pretty big - you guys are important, you should be well traveled. I would be disappointed at a European never leaving Europe too.:

 

You must have lots of money. Most people - not just Amerikans - simply can't afford in both money AND time - to simply leave their country for ****s and giggles. Hell, I probably personally could afford to go vacation in a different country but I don't trust other country's laws. It's bad enough having to worry about my country's own stupid alws let alone  some lame azz country in Euope's stupid laws or US's stupid laws or Asia's stupid  laws, etc.

DWARVES IN PROJECT ETERNITY = VOLOURN HAS PLEDGED $250.

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12. A weekend bag

 

- What is this?

I think the male equivilent to the "overnight case" women have.

 

Lol, seriously its a bag that you can throw a few things into for a short trip.

 

15. Double-hinged wine key

 

- What is this?

Its a device for opening corked bottles easily

 

27. A leatherman

 

- What?

 

Its a combination tool. The one pictured - the Skeletool - has a stainless steel combo blade, pliers, bit driver, removable pocket clip and carabiner/bottle opener

 

31. A French press

 

- Le what?

A fancy coffee pot. I'm never going to be a man, apparently, because I find coffee a vile drink.

Edited by Amentep
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I cannot - yet I must. How do you calculate that? At what point on the graph do "must" and "cannot" meet? Yet I must - but I cannot! ~ Ro-Man

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