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Do you have a zombie plan?


Tale

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We are lucky in England because aside from the cricket bats we also have working castles. Which are pretty much ideal for zombies. The very best kind would e one bordered by water so you have non-ground based egress and entry. High walls would work for classic and running zombies.

 

I'm mostly worried by how many of us have put a lot of thought into this though.

"It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"."

             -Elwood Blues

 

tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.

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I'm mostly worried by how many of us have put a lot of thought into this though.

 

Because you might not be first to the castle?

 

Well, you chaps can share the castle with me, but I don't like the notion of a bunch of randoms showing up.

 

I also dispute the notion of avoiding the zombies. I say you stake out your area and you proactively neutralise them. I'm thinking catapulted nets, followed by methodical smushing. If you clear out your region you could probably expand outwards in time. Get back to normal.

"It wasn't lies. It was just... bull****"."

             -Elwood Blues

 

tarna's dead; processing... complete. Disappointed by Universe. RIP Hades/Sand/etc. Here's hoping your next alt has a harp.

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I'd get a raft and sit in my neighbor's pool.

 

Zombies can't swim!

 

stay in the deep end!

 

I'm thinking catapulted nets, followed by methodical smushing. If you clear out your region you could probably expand outwards in time. Get back to normal.

 

Slow zombies are no problem, especially if your mobile at all.

 

If they are the speedy type of zombies I see problems.

 

At least your effectively on a large island

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My plan contains three olives, rubber gloves, lubricant, live chicken and numbers 5 to 9 from keyboard.

 

Edit: Crap, wrong plan. Man, that would have been ankward. Shotgun and ammunition is my plan for zombies.

Edited by kirottu

This post is not to be enjoyed, discussed, or referenced on company time.

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Arm myself. Find and organize anyone I could. Head to the local police station, or our nearby Air Force base, and dig in.

 

Once we establish a defensive fortification we start the war. :blink:

Edited by LoneWolf16

I had thought that some of nature's journeymen had made men and not made them well, for they imitated humanity so abominably. - Book of Counted Sorrows

 

'Cause I won't know the man that kills me

and I don't know these men I kill

but we all wind up on the same side

'cause ain't none of us doin' god's will.

- Everlast

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I honestly think all of you are looking too much into this. You can kill a lot of undead with a plain old baseball bat. Aluminum or wooden, it doesn't matter.

 

As for my plan, I'd go to my drug dealers house. Not only does he have armaments, he also has...drugs?

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Jaguars4ever is still alive.  No word of a lie.

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I honestly think all of you are looking too much into this.  You can kill a lot of undead with a plain old baseball bat.  Aluminum or wooden, it doesn't matter.

 

As for my plan, I'd go to my drug dealers house.  Not only does he have armaments, he also has...drugs?

Spoken like a true rookie.

 

Speaking back to a couple of years ago when the zombies infested campus. I heard the screaming from my apartment, it woke me up. I had decided to skip class and get extra sleep. But, I am only a block from the campus. So, with the screaming I naturally went to see what was going on. And apparently my neighbor had the same inclination. When we saw zombies, my neighbor, damned if I can remember his name now, thought it would be terrific fun to take his louisville slugger and go zombie hunting.

 

The first campus invasion of the undead I experienced I spent the entire time defensive, so I decided I'd join in as well, get some offensive practice. Heck, it could be fun, just like a video game! I got two of my katanas (cheap katanas, bad idea, fyi) and went with him.

 

As we approach campus, we encounter two fresh undead free of packs and decide to get our first shots in. He goes to club one, I try to cut off the head of the other. He swings and hits the first in the head, it goes down. I swing to cut the other's head off and I end up with a shambling, decaying, pez dispenser. He swayed as he moved and after each of his steps forward, his head would flap. So, he was still moving and a danger. I look to my neighbor, we shrug in unison, he pulls back the bat to make a swing at my unfinished zombie and then he starts screaming.

 

The first zombie he hit on the head wasn't out of commission, he just knocked it down. It takes a lot more than a simple bonk to finish off most zombie, especially converts. Decaying corpses it can work on, but the problem with infestation is that the decaying corpses got a hold of fresh meat that doesn't fail as easily. You have to swing hard. And you can tire fast.

 

I won't go into detail about what happened to my neighbor. But, I will say I know how easy it is to tire when you swing that bat like you mean it. I picked up his bat took out three.

Edited by Tale
"Show me a man who "plays fair" and I'll show you a very talented cheater."
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Pfft...you fought college zombies.  Everyone knows zombies who have jobs are much more ruthless.

All the more reason not to underestimate them!

"Show me a man who "plays fair" and I'll show you a very talented cheater."
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Damn it, Nartwak & Raven have been compromised!

 

And I highly recommend some of you read the actual Zombie Survival Guide as it may just save your life in all this, I keep mine on me at all times.

 

Here are some excerts on general Zombie fights rules and use of weapons seeing as how this seems to be the topic of current discussion.

 

GENERAL RULES:

 

1. OBEY THE LAW!: Regulations governing weapons such as

frearms and explosives depend on your location. Follow them to

the letter. Punishment may range from a sizable fine to incarceration.

In any case, the resulting criminal record is something you

cannot afford! When the dead rise, law enforcement must look upon

you as a model citizen, someone to be trusted and left alone, not a

felon of questionable background who should be interrogated at the

first sign of trouble. Fomnately, as this chapter will show, simpler,

legal weapons will serve you much better than paramilitary death

machines.

 

2. TRAIN CONSTANTLY: No matter what weapon you choose,

from a simple machete to a semiautomatic rifle, it must become an

extension of your body. Practice as often as possible. If classes are

available, by all means sign up. Learning from qualified instructors

will save immense time and energy. If the device can he disassembled,

do so, both in sunlight and total darkness until you know every

pin, every spring, every curve and edge of that all-important

machine. With practice will come both experience and confidence,

two traits you must develop in order to successfully do battle with

the living dead. History has proven that a well-trained individual,

with nothing but a rock, has a better chance of survival than a novice

with the latest technological marvel.

 

3. CARE FOR YOUR TOOLS: Weapons, no matter how simple they

may be, must he cared for as if they were living things. Anyone with

firearm experience knows that inspection and cleaning are part of

everyday use. This also applies to close-combat weapons. Blades

need polish and rust protection. Grips need checking and maintenance.

Never abuse your tools or expose them to unnecessary damage.

If possible, have them tested regularly by experienced

professionals. These experts may detect early-stage defects imperceptible

to the amateur user.

 

4. BEWARE DISPLAY ITEMS: Many companies offer a variety of

replica weapons, such as swords, bows, etc., that are meant merely

for decoration. Always research your chosen item thoroughly and

ensure that it is intended for actual use in the real world. Do not rely

solely on the company's word. "Battle ready" may mean the item

could withstand a few blows on a theatrical stage, or at some historical

fair, but it will snap in half during a life-or-death confrontation.

If resources permit, purchase a duplicate item and train with it

to the breaking point. Only then should you trust in its abilities.

 

5. DEVELOP THE FIRST WEAPON: The human body, if cared for

and trained properly, is the greatest weapon on earth. Americans are

notorious for their bad diet, lack of exercise, and relentless fetish for

labor-saving technology. As recognizable as the term "couch

potato" is, a more accurate term would be "cattle": fat, lazy, listless,

and ready to he eaten. Weapon No. 1, the biological tool that is our

body, can and must be transformed from prey to predator. Obey a

strict diet and physical-fitness regimen. Concentrate on cardiovascular

instead of strength-building exercise. Monitor any chronic

health conditions you may have, no matter how small. Even if your

worst ailment is allergies, treat them regularly! When a situation

does arise, you must know exactly what your body is capable of!

Study and master at least one martial art. Make sure its emphasis is

on escaping holds rather than delivering blows. Knowing how to

slip from a zombie's clutches is the single most important

can possess when yon find yourself in close combat.

 

 

CLOSE COMBAT

Hand-to-hand combat should almost always be avoided. Given a zombie's

lack of speed, it is much easier to run (or walk quickly) than stand

and fight. However, it may be necessary to destroy a zombie at close

quarters. When this happens, split-second timing is critical. A wrong

move, a moment's hesitation, and you may feel cold hands gripping

your arm, or sharp, broken teeth biting into your flesh. For this reason

above all, choosing a close-combat weapon is more important than any

other in this section.

 

1. BLUDGEONS

When using a blunt weapon, the goal is to cmsh the brain (remember,

the only way to kill a zombie is by destroying its brain). This is not as

easy as it sounds. The human skull is one of the hardest, most durable

surfaces in nature. So, of course, is the zombie's.

Extreme force is needed to fracture, let alone shatter

it. However, this must be done, and done with a

single, well-placed blow. Missing your target or I'I

failing to breach the bone will leave you with no

second chance.

 

Sticks, ax handles, and other wooden clubs are

good for knocking a zombie out of the way or beating

off an individual attack. What they lack is the

weight and strength necessaq

for a lethal strike. A section of lead pipe will work

/I for a single encounter but is too heavy for those on

the move. A sledgehammer has the same drawback

and also requires practice for its user to hit a moving

target. Aluminum bats are light enough to work

for one, maybe two fights, but are known to bend

after prolonged use. The standard, one-handed carpenter's

hammer has striking power but severely

limited reach. Its short handle allows a zombie to

grab your arm and pull it in. The police baton, made of acetate plastic

(in most cases), is sbong enough for any battle but lacks the lethal

power for a one-blow kill. (Note: This was intended in its design.)

The best bludgeon is a steel crowbar. Its relatively

lightweight and durable construction makes it ideal

for prolonged close combat. Its curved, semisharpened

edge also allows for a stabbing motion

through the eye socket, directly into the brain case. I%'

More than one survivor has reported killing zombies

in this manner. Another benefit of the crowbar is that

it may he necessary to pry open a door, shift a heavy

object, or perform other tasks for which it was originally

designed. None of these functions can be

accomplished with any of the previously mentioned items. Even

lighter and more durable than the steel crowbar is the titanium model,

now trickling into Western markets from Eastern Europe and the former

Soviet Union.

 

2. EDGED WEAPONS

Blades, in any form, have advantages and

disadvantages over bludgeons. Those

hat have enough strength to l i t the

skull rarely stand up after many repetitions.

For this reason, slicing, particularly

decapitation, serves almost the

same function as a head blow. (Note: The

severed head of a zombie is still able to

bite and must be regarded as a threat.)

The advantage of slicing over bludgeoning

is that it can make killing a zombie unnecesssuy. In some cases,

I simply chopping off a limb or severing the spine is enough to disable

! an undead assailant. (Note: Severing a limb also brings the possibility

of contact with the virus through the exposed area.)

The civilian ax can easily crnsh a zombie's skull, smashing through

bone and brain in one swing. Decapitation is equally easy, which is

why the ax has been the favored tool of executioners for centuries.

Connecting with a moving head, however, might be difficult.

Furthermore, if the swing ends in a total miss, you might be taken off

balance.

 

The smaller, one-handed hatchet is a good weapon of last resort. If

you find yourself cornered, and larger weapons are useless, a hatchet

blow will more than take care of an attacker.

 

The sword is the ideal edged weapon, but not every kind will suffice.

Foils, rapiers, and similar fencing weapons are not suited for slicing.

Their only possible use would be a direct stab through the eye

socket followed by a quick swirling action through the brain. This

motion, however, has been accomplished only once, by a Pained

I swordsman, and is therefore not recommended.

 

Single-handed long swords allow you a free hand for other tasks

such as opening a door or defending your body with a shield. Their

only drawback is the lack of swinging power. One arm may not have

the strength to slice through the thick cartilage between bones. Another

drawback is its user's notorious lack of accuracy. Scoring a flesh

wound anywhere on the body of a living opponent is one thing.

Making an exact, clean chop through the neck is something else altogether.

Double-handed swords could be considered the best in their class,

providing the strength and accuracy for perfect decapitation. Of this

type, the Japanese Samurai Katana ranks first. Its weight (three to five

pounds) is perfect for long-term conflicts, and its blade can sever the

toughest organic fiber.

 

In tight quarters, shorter blades hold the advantage. The Roman

Gladius is one choice, although combat-ready replicas are hard to find.

The Japanese Ninjite boasts a two-handed grip and, in genuine models,

renowned tempered steel. Both factors make it a superior weapon.

The common machete, because of its size, weight, and availability, is

probably your best choice. If possible, fmd the military type usually

sold a t h y surplus stores. Its steel tends to be of a higher quality, and

its blackened blade helps concealment at night.

 

3. MISCELLANEOUS HAND WEAPONS

Spears, pikes, and tridents serve to skewer a zombie, keeping it out of

reach but not necessarily scoring a kill. The chance of an eye-socket

stab is possible, hut remote. The medieval European halberd (an axspear

hybrid) may serve as a chopping weapon but, again, requires

great amounts of skill and practice to accomplish a decapitating blow.

Other than using them as bludgeons, or keeping your attacker at a distance,

these weapons serve little purpose.

 

Morning stars or "flails," a spiked ball chained to a rod, do basically

the same damage as a crowbar, albeit in a more dramatic way. The

owner swings the rod in a wide, circular motion, providing enough

momentum to bring the hall crashing through the skull of his or her

opponent. Using this weapon takes considerable skill, and it is therefore

not recommended.

 

The medieval European mace serves the same function as the standard

household hammer but without benefit of the latter's practical

uses. A mace cannot pry open a door or window, drive a chisel, or hammer

a nail. Attempting such an act could result in accidental injury.

Therefore, carry this medieval weapon only when no alternative is

available.

 

Knives are always useful, serving a variety of functions in a range

of situations. Unlike a hatchet, they can kill a zombie only when the

blade is stabbed through the temple, eye socket, or base of the skull.

On the flip side, knives almost always weigh less than hatchets and,

therefore, are better if you are on the move. When choosing a knife,

make sure the blade is no more than six inches long and always

smooth. Avoid serrated knives and saw-blade combinations found in

survival knives, as they tend to become lodged in their victims.

Imagine yourself stabbing one zombie through the temple and turning

to engage the other three ghouls but not being able to retrieve your

blade.

 

The trench spike is, without a doubt, the best compact anti-zombie

weapon on earth. It is a combination of a seven-inch steel spike for a

blade and brass knuckles for a handle. It was developed during the

vicious hand-to-hand combat of World War I, where soldiers killed

each other in trenches no wider than a few feet. Specifically, it was

designed to stab downward, through an enemy's steel helmet. Yon can

imagine how effective this weapon would be against a zombie. The

user could stab easily through a zombie's skull, withdraw cleanly and

quickly, then turn to either brain another zombie or, at the very least,

knock one over with a brass-knuckle punch to the face. Original models

are extremely rare, with barely a few remaining in museums and the

homes of private collectors. However, if accurate, detailed schematics

can be found, have one or perhaps two combat-ready, stress-tested

replicas made. They will be an investment you will never regret.

 

 

The Shaolin Spade

This weapon bears special mention in the anti-ghoul arsenal. It may

appear unconventional: a six-foot hardwood staff with a flat, bellshaped

blade on one end and an outward-facing crescent blade on the

other. Its roots date hack to a bronze-bladed agricultural tool used during

the Chinese Shang Dynasty (1766-1 122 B.C.E.). When Buddhism

migrated to China, the spade was adopted by Shaolin monks as both

tool and weapon. On several occasions, it has proven to be surprisingly

effective against the living dead. Thmstiug forward with either blade

will produce instant decapitation, while its length provides complete

safety for the user. This length does make it impractical for indoor

combat, and it should therefore be avoided in those situations. In open

spaces, however, nothing combines the safety of a spear with the

killing power of a katana sword like the Shaolin spade.

A variety of other hand weapons exist around the world, and space

does not permit the author to discuss each one individually. If you discover

an implement or tool that you think might make a good weapon,

ask yourself these questions:

 

1. Can it crush a skull in one blow?

2. If not, can it decapitate in said blow?

3. Is it easy to handle?

4. Is it light?

5. Is it durable?

 

Questions 3,4, and 5 will have to depend on your present situation.

Questions 1 and 2 are essential!

 

4. POWER TOOLS

Popular fiction has shown us the awesome, brutal power of the chainsaw.

Its lightning-quick, rotating teeth can easily slice through flesh

and bone, making the strength and skill required for manual weapons

unnecessary. Its roar might also give the owner a much-needed psychological

boost-empowerment in a situation where abject terror is

a given. How many horror movies have you seen in which this industrial

killing machine has spelled doom for anyone and anything it

touched? In reality, however, chainsaws and similar powered devices

rank extremely low on the list of practical zombie-killing weapons. For

starters, their fuel supply is finite. Once drained, they provide as much

protection as a hand-held stereo. Carrying extra fuel or power cells

leads to the second inherent problem: weight. The average chainsaw

weighs ten pounds, compared to a two-pound machete. Why increase

the chances of exhaustion? Safety must also be considered. One slip,

and the spinning teeth might be slicing through your skull just as easily

as your enemy's. L i e any machine, another problem is noise. A

chainsaw's distinctive roar, even if running for just a few seconds, will

be enough to broadcast to every zombie within earshot, "Dinner is

served!"

 

SLINGS AND ARROWS

It is a commonly held notion that using non-f~earrnb allistics such as

bows and slingshots are a waste of energy and resources. In most

cases, this is true. However, if used properly, such a weapon will

enable you to score a kill at long range with little or no sound. What if

you're attempting to escape an infested area, yon tum a comer, and a

single ghoul blocks your path? It's too far away for a hand weapon.

Before you get close, its moans will betray your position. The crack of

a firearm will sound an even louder alarm. What do you do? In cases

like these, certain silent weapons may be your only option.

 

1. SLING

Made famous from the biblical story of David and Goliath, this

weapon has been part of our heritage since prehistoric times. The user

places a smooth, round stone in the wider center of a thin leather strip,

grabs both ends, swings it repeatedly in a rapid circle, then releases

one end of the strip, loosing the stone at his target. Theoretically, it is

possible to dispatch a zombie with a silent headshot at just under thirty

paces. However, even with months of training, the chances of scoring

such a hit are one in ten at best. With no experience, the wielder would

be better off just throwing stones.

 

2. SLINGSHOT

A descendant of the leather strap, the modem slingshot has at least ten

times the accuracy of its ancestor, the sling. What it lacks is punch.

Small projectiles fired from a modem slingshot simply do not have the

force, even at minimum range, to penetrate a zombie's skull. Using this

weapon might serve only to alert a ghoul to your presence.

 

3. THE BLOWGUN

Given that poison has no effect on the undead, discount this weapon

entirely.

 

4. SHURIKEN

These small, multipoint devices were used in feudal Japan to pierce a

human skull. In appearance they resemble a steel, two-dimensional

replica of a shining star, hence their nickname, "throwing stars." In

expert hands, they could easily bring down a zombie. However, as with

many weapons discussed, the throwing star requires great expertise.

Unless you are one of the few masters of this art (only a handful can

still claim this title), refrain from such an exotic method.

As with shuriken, these short-range weapons require weeks of practice

to hit something as large as a human body and months to hit something

as small as a human head. Only a dedicated expert could even hope for

a reliable zombie kill. The time and energy spent training could be

much more productive if applied to a conventional weapon. Remember,

you have a variety of skills to learn, and not aU the time in the world to

learn them. Don't waste those valuable hours attempting to master a

third-rate weapon.

 

6. Tm LONG OR COMPOUND BOW

To be blunt, hitting a zombie

through the head with an arrow is

an extremely difficult feat. Even

with compound bows and modem

sights, only experienced archers

have a chance of making a direct

shot. The only practical use for

this weapon is the delivery of

incendiaq arrows. For starting

fires silently, at long distance,

nothing works better than a flaming arrow. This manner of attack can,

and has, been used to set undead individuals on fue. The targeted zombie

will not know enough to pull the mow fiom its body and might,

given the right circumstances, bum other ghouls before succumbing to

the flames. (See "Fire," pages 51-54, for appropriate use.)

 

7. THE CROSSBOW

The power and accuracy of a modem crossbow can send a "bolt"

(crossbow mow) clean through a zombie's skull at over a quarter mile.

Small wonder it has been dubbed "the perfect silent killer."

Marksmanship is important, hut no more so than with a rifle.

Reloading requires time and strength, but this should he unnecessary.

The crossbow is a sniper's weapon, not a crowd-stopper. Use only

against one zombie. Any more, and you might find yourself grabbed

and mauled before you have time to load another bolt. As for bolts,

either triangular or bullet-shape will suffice. For increased accuracy, a

telescopic sight should be added. Unfortunately, the size and weight of

any good crossbow will make it the primary weapon. Therefore,

choose one only when the situation permits, such as traveling in a

group, defending your home, or when no silenced frearms are available.

 

8. THE HAND BOW

Smaller, one-handed crossbows can serve as a complement to your primary

weapon. Carrying one means that a compact, silent weapon will

always be on band if needed. In comparison to the larger crossbow,

hand bows have inferior accuracy, power, and range. Using one means

getting closer to the target. This increases not only the danger but the

risk of detection, which, in turn, negates the need for a silent weapon.

Use the hand bow carefully, and sparingly.

 

FIREARMS

Of all the weapons discussed in this book, nothing is more important

than your primary firearm. Keep it cleaned, keep it oiled, keep it

loaded, keep it close. With a cool bead, steady band, and plenty of

ammunition, one human is more than a match for an army of zombies.

Choosing a fuearm must be an exact science, with every variable

considered. What is your primary goal: defense, attack, or flight? What

outbreak class are you facing? How many people, if any, are in your

group? What environment is your battleground? Different firearms

serve different functions. Almost none serve all. Selecting the perfect

tools means dispelling conventional doctrines of warfare that have

worked so well against our fellow humans. Sadly, we know all too well

how to kill each other. Killing zombies-that's another story.

 

1. THE HEAVY MACHINE GUN

Since World War I, this invention has revolutionized human conflict.

Its mechanism allows a storm of lead to be discharged in seconds.

These tactics may be invaluable on the human battlefield but are a

feckless waste against the living dead. Remember, yon are going for a

head shot: one bullet, precisely placed. As the machine gun is designed

for saturation fire, it may take hundreds, even thousands of rounds for

one, randomly lethal shot. Even aiming the machine gun as a rifle (a

tactic nsed by U.S. special forces) is a losing proposition. Why hit a

zombie with a well-aimed five-round burst when one well-aimed rifle

shot produces the same result? In the 1970% one school of thought

favored the "scythe theory": If a machine gun is placed at the head

level of an undead crowd, it could mow them down with one long

burst. This argument has been debunked-ghouls, like the humans

they nsed to be, are not all the same height. Even if some are destroyed,

at least half will survive to close on your position. But what about the

massive body damage caused by these weapons? Won't a machine gun

have enough punch to rip a body in half, and doesn't that negate the

need for a head shot? Yes and no. The standard 5.56-millimeter round

used by the U.S. Army SAW (Squad Automatic Weapon) does have the

ability to snap a human spine, sever limbs, or yes, tear a zombie's form

in two. This, however, does not mean a head shot is unnecessary. For

one, the chance of dismembering a zombie is slight and therefore

requires large amounts of ammunition. For another, unless the brain is

destroyed, the zombie itself is still alive-crippled, yes, perhaps even

immobile, but still alive. Why give yourself the umecessary need of

having to finish off a mass of writhing and potentially dangerous body

parts?

 

2. THE E SUBMACHINGEUN

The problem presented by this weapon is similar to that of the heavy

machine gun: ammo expended versus living dead dispatched.

However, when fighting in tight quarters, the submachine gun finds its

niche. The short barrel makes it easier to handle than a rifle, but the

folding stock gives it much more support than a pistol. Always be sure

to keep it on the single-shot setting. As we discussed, full auto is simply

a waste of ammo. Also, be sure to aim it from the shoulder.

Shooting from the hip will produce nothing more than a loud noise and

a clean miss. One disadvantage is poor accuracy at long range.

Because the submachine gun was designed as a close-combat weapon,

you will have to get much closer to a zombie than if you were carrying

a rifle or assault weapon. This would normally not be a problem

except that submachine guns, like all auto and semiautomatic

weapons, have the possibility of jamming while in use. At short range,

I you may be putting yourself at unnecessary risk. This is the only reason

to discount a submachine gun as your primary weapon.

 

3. THE ASSAULT RIFLE

This weapon was invented originally to bridge the gap between the

rifle and submachine gun, offering both range and rapid fre. Wouldn't

these traits make it ideal against the undead? Not really. Although

range and accuracy are needed, rapid tire, as we've seen, is not. Even

though an assault rifle can be set for semiautomatic, just like a submachine

gun, the temptation to go full auto still exists, as it does with

a submachine gun. When fighting for your life, it may simply be too

! easy to flip the switch to "rock 'n' roll," no matter how wasteful and

useless this might be. If you do choose an assault rifle as your primaq

weapon, keep in mind the basic questions that apply to all firearms:

I What is its range? What is its accuracy? Is the appropriate ammunition

 

1 readily available? How easy is it to clean and maintain?

To answer some of these questions, it is best to examine two

extreme examples. The U.S. Army M16Al is considered by many to

be the worst assault rifle ever invented. Its overcomplicated mecha44

nism is both difficult to clean and prone to jamming. Adjusting the

sight, something that must be done eveIy time a target shifts its range,

requires the use of a nail, ballpoint pen, or similar device. What if you

didn't have one, or lost it as several dozen zombies shambled steadily

toward you? The delicate plastic stock of the M16A1 obviates bayonet

use, and by attempting to use it as such you would risk shattering

the hollow, spring-loaded stock. This is a critical flaw. If you were confronted

by multiple ghouls and your Al jammed, you would be unable

to use it as a last-ditch hand-to-hand weapon. In the 1960s, the MI6

(originally the AR-15) was designed for Air Force base security. For

political reasons typical of the militiuy-industrial complex (you buy

my weapon, you get my vote and my campaign contribution), it was

adopted as the principal infantry weapon for the U.S. Army. So poor

was its early battle record that during the Vietnam War, communist

guerrillas refused to take them from dead Americans. The newer

M16A2, although somewhat of an improvement, is still regarded as a

second-class weapon. If given the choice, emulate the Vietcong and

ignore the M16 entirely.

 

On the opposite end of the spectrum, the Soviet AK-47 is considered

the best assault rifle ever made. Although heavier than the M16

(10.58 pounds versus 7 pounds) and possessing a considerably harder

kick, this weapon is famous for its rugged efficiency and sturdy construction.

Its wide, spacious firing mechanism prevents jamming from

di or sand. In hand-to-hand combat, you could either stab a zombie

through the eye socket with the weapon's bayonet or use the solid,

steel-backed wooden stock to smash through a zombie's skull. If imiThe

tation is the sincerest form of flattery, then several nations have chosen

to flatter the AK with either direct copies (Chinese Type 56) or

modified designs (Israeli Galil). Again, although the assault rifle is not

ideal for defense against the living dead, a member of the AK-47 family

will be your best bet.

 

4. Tm BOLT-/LEVER-ACTION RIFLE

A product of the mid-nineteenth century, these weapons are often

regarded as obsolete. Why use a hunting rifle when you can own a submachine

gun? Such arrogance is simply unfounded, its roots based in

techno-chauvinism and the absence of practical experience. A wellmade,

expertly used bolt- or lever-action rifle offers a defense against

the living dead that is as good if not better than the latest military hardware.

A rifle's single-shot capability forces the user to make each

round count, increasing the chance of a hit. This feature also eliminates

even the possibility of "rock 'n' rolling," and therefore preserving

ammunition whether the user intends to or not. A third reason is the

relative easiness to clean and operate a rifle, something that must not

be overlooked. Hunting rifles are designed for a civilian market.

Manufacturers know that if they are too complex, sales will plummet.

A fourtb and final reason is ready availability of ammunition. As there

are more civilian gun shops than military armories in the United States

(a pattern not shared by the rest of the world), yon will find it easier to

obtain ammunition for a hunting rifle than an assault weapon or submachine

gun. This will prove critical in any of the scenarios covered

in the latter part of this manual.

When choosing a bolt- or lever-action rifle, try to find an older, military

version if possible. This does not mean that civilian models are

inferior weapons-quite the opposite-but almost all military boltaction

rifles were designed for use in hand-to-hand combat. Make sure

you take the time to study the use of a rifle for this purpose. Simply

swinging it like a club would destroy any weapon, military and civilian

alike. Manuals are available that explain how to use a rifle as a

bludgeon. Even old war films can demonstrate how deadly these

weapons are without firing a shot. Examples of bolt-action military

rifles are the U.S. Springfield, the British Lee Enfield, and the German

Mauser Kar 98k. Many of these still exist, some in good working

order. Before choosing, however, make sure the appropriate ammunition

is in ready supply. Having an impressive, bolt-action military rifle

will do no good if the only rounds available fit civilian models.

 

5. THE SEMIAUTOMATIC R ~ E

Since its debut, this weapon has shown itself to be a superior zombie

killer. Given the possibility of wasting ammunition (a round is

expended every time the trigger is pulled), a fair amount of discipline

is required. However, this option can be a blessing when engaging

multiple targets. In one recorded instance, a trapped woman dispatched

fifteen attacking zombies in twelve seconds! (See "1947 A.D., Jarvie,

British Columbia," pages 223-24.) This story illustrates the potential

of a semiautomatic rifle. For close combat or for people on the run, the

semiautomatic carbine serves the same function as the larger model.

Although possessing half the range, the carbine tends to be lighter and

easier to c q , and uses smaller ammunition. Either type will serve

you well, depending on the situation. When choosing a semiautomatic

weapon, the World War I1 M1 Garand or M1 Carbine are, in many

ways, superior to contemporary weapons. This may be surprising, but

these older military weapons were designed to survive the greatest

conflict in history. Not only did they meet this task admirably, but the

Garand remained the U.S. Army's main rifle through the Korean conflict,

while the Carbine saw action up until the first years of Vietnam.

Another advantage of the M1 Garand is its secondary role as a handto-

hand weapon (in WWII, bayonet use was still considered a vital part

of combat). Although no longer in production, many Garands still

remain on the market with ammunition widely available. The h41

Carbine is, amazingly, still in production. Its light weight and short

muzzle perfectly suit this weapon to indoor combat or long journeys

on foot. Other, more modem choices include the Ruger Mini-30,

Ruger Mini-14, and the Chinese Type 56 (a copy of the Soviet SKS

carbine, not to be confused with the assault rifle of the same name). If

discipline can be maintained, you will not find a better weapon than

the semiautomatic rifle.

 

6. THE SHOTGUN

At close range against human attackers, this weapon reigns supreme.

Against the living dead, this is not entirely true. A good twelve-gauge

shotgun can literally blow a zombie's head off. However, the longer

the range, the greater the pellet dispersal pattern, and the lesser chance

of skull penetration. A solid slug would have the same effect as a rifle,

even at greater range (provided the barrel is long enough), but in that

case, why not just use a rifle? What shotguns do possess is stopping

power. The scattering shot acts as a solid wall, whereas a rifle bullet

might pass clean through or miss the target altogether. If you are cornered,

or on the run, and need time to escape, a good shotgun blast can

send several zombies sprawling. The downside of a shotgun is that the

large, twelve-gauge shells are bulky and therefore burdensome when ~ ~

traveling and leave less room for other equipment. This must be considered

if a long journey is required.

 

7. THE PISTOL

Americans have a special relationship with handguns. They seem to

appear in every movie, every TV show, every pop novel, every comic

book. Our heroes have always carried them, from the Old West lawman

to the gritty urban cop. Gangsters rap about them; liberals and

conservatives fight over them. Parents shelter children from them and

manufacturers make untold fortunes from them. Possibly more than

the automobile, the handgun is synonymous with America. But how

useful is this cultural icon against a swarm of newly risen flesh-eaters?

In truth, not very. Unlike our fictional heroes, the average person may

have difficulty hitting anything, let alone something as small and

mobile as a zombie's head. Throw in the obvious emotional strain of

undead combat, and the possibility of a successful shot ranks one step

above negotiating with your attacker. Studies have shown that of all

wasted ballistic wounds-e.g., those that struck a zombie in a nonlethal

way-73 percent came from some type of handgun. A laser sight

increases the odds of accurate aim hut does nothing to steady a shaky

wrist. Where handguns do come in handy is in extreme circumstances.

If yon are grabbed by a zombie, a pistol can be a life-saver. Pressing

its muzzle against the undead temple and squeezing the trigger takes

no skill and ensures a positive kill. The fact that handguns are small,

light, and easy to cany make them attractive as a secondary weapon

for any scenario. If your primary weapon is a carbine, this adds the

possibility of shared ammo and lighter load. For these reasons, a pistol

should always be carried when confronting ghouls, but as a backup

only. Never forget that many dismembered, half-eaten corpses have

been discovered with these wonder weapons still clutched in their cold,

dead hands.

 

8. .22-CALIBERRIM FIRE WEAPONS

These weapons (rifle or pistol) fire a round no wider than a few millimeters

and no longer than an inch. In normal circumstances it is usnally

relegated to practice, competition, or the hunting of small game.

In an attack by the undead, however, the diminutive .22 rimfire stands

proudly alongside its heavier cousins. The small size of its rounds

allows you to cany three times as much ammunition. This also makes

the weapon itself lighter, a godsend on long treks through ghoulinfested

territory. The ammunition is also easy to manufacture and

plentiful throughout the country. No shop that sells any kind of ammunition

would fail to stock .22 rimfire. 'ho disadvantages present themselves,

however, when the use of a .22 is considered. The small round

has zero stopping power. People (including former President Reagan)

have been shot with .22s and not even realized it until later. A ghoul ~ taking a round to the chest would not even he slowed, let alone

i stopped, by this puny projectile. Another problem is the lack of skull

penetration at longer ranges. With a .22, you might have to get a little

too close for comfort, a fact that could increase stress and degrade the

odds of a kill. By the same token, the lack of power in a round fired

by a .22 has been called a blessing in disguise. Without the force to

punch through the back of a zombie's skull, .22 bullets have been

known to ricochet inside the brain case, doing as much damage as any

.45. So when it comes time to arm yourself against a looming zombie

menace, do not discount the small, almost toylike nature of this nimble,

efficient fireann.

 

9. A c c ~ s s o ~ ~ ~ s

Silencers, if attainable, can he a vital attachment to your firearm. Their

ability to muffle noise obviates the need for a how, sling, or other nonballistic

weapon (essential if on the move).

A telescopic sight can increase aim immeasurably, especially for

long-range sniper attacks. Laser sights, on the surface, may be your

best bet. After all, how hard is it to place a red dot on a ghoul's forehead?

The disadvantage is limited battery life. The same goes for

night-vision scopes. Although they allow for accurate, long-range hits

on zombies after dark, they become nothing more than useless black

tubes when the power runs out. Conventional glass and metal sights

are the preferable accessory. They may not be fancy, and they may lack

the cachet of electronics, but these basic instruments will never let you

down.

 

 

RANGE VERSUS ACCURACY

Studies have shown that, given the trauma of battle. the closer a

human is to a zombie. the wilder his shooting will be. When practicing

with your firearm(s). establish a maximum range for repeated

accuracy. Practice against moving targets in ideal (stress-free) conditions.

Once that range is fixed. divide it by half. This will be your effective

kill zone during an actual attack. Make sure the undead do not

move closer than this zone. as your accuracy will erode. If engaging

a group. make sure to hit those that enter the zone first before dispatching

the others. Do not discount this advice no matter what your

previous experience has been. Street-hardened police officers. decorated

combat veterans. even -cold-blooded" murderers have ended

up as well-chewed meat because they believed in their "nerves" and

not their training.

 

EXPLOSIVES

Question: What could be better than hurling a hand grenade at a mass

of approaching zombies? Answer: almost anything. Anti-personnel

explosives kill mainly by shrapnel, metal shards tearing through vital

organs. As this will not affect zombies, and the chance of shrapnel penetrating

the skull is slim, grenades, bombs, and other explosive tools

are inefficient weapons.

These devices should not be completely discounted, though. For

blasting through doors, creating instant barricades, or even scattering

zombie mobs, nothing works better than a jar of gunpowder.

 

FIRE

The living dead have no fear of fire. Waving an open flame in a ghoul's

face will do nothing to slow or impede its advance. Zombies who have

caught fne will neither notice nor react to the engulfing flames in any

way. Too many humans have met with tragedy forfailing to understand

thatfire is no deterrent to zombies!

 

As a weapon, however, fire is still humanity's greatest ally.

Complete incineration is the best way to destroy a zombie once and for

all. Burning eliminates not only the body but all traces of Solanurn.

However, don't think a flamethrower and several Molotov ****tails

are the solution to all your problems. In actual combat, fire can be as

deadly a threat as it is a protector.

 

Flesh-human, undead, or othenvise-takes a long time to bum. In

the minutes or hours before a blazing zombie succumbs, it will become

a walking-or to be perfectly accurate, a shambling-torch. Several

cases have been recorded in which burning ghouls have done more

damage, even caused more deaths, than they would have with only

their fingernails and teeth.

 

Fire itself has no loyalty. Consider the flammable nature of your

surroundings, the chance of smoke inhalation, the possibility that a

blaze will act as a beacon for other zombies. All these factors must be

considered before such a powerful and unpredictable weapon is

unleashed.

 

For this reason, fire is mainly considered an attack or flight weapon,

and rarely used for static defense.

 

1. MOLOTOV ****TAILS

This term applies to any jar of flammable liquid with a primitive fuse.

It is a cheap, effective way to kill multiple zombies at once. If the situation

permits-e.g., fleeing an advancing horde, clearing a fireproof

structure, or destroying a flammable structure with multiple zombies

trapped in it-by all means, bombard the ghouls in question until nothing

is left hut ash.

 

2. DOUSING

The act of dousing consists of simply filling a bucket with flammable

liquid (gasoline, kerosene, etc.), throwing it at a zombie or zombies,

lighting a match, and mnning. If there is room for escape and no danger

of residual fire damage, the only drawback to this method is the

close proximity required to fully drench the enemy.

 

3. THE BLOWTORCH

The common torch, which consists of a propane tank attached to a nozzle,

has neither the heating power nor the fuel supply to bum through

a zombie skull. But it can be a convenient firestarter if the undead in

question have already been soaked in a flammable liquid.

54 Max Brooks

 

4. Tm FLAMETHROWER

This device, perhaps more than

any other, shikes people as the ultimate

zombie eliminator. A jet of

flame, two hundred feet long, composed

of jellied gasoline, can turn

an undead crowd into a wailing

funeral pyre. So why not acquire

one? Why not forsake all other

weapons for this man-made firebreathing

dragon? The answers are

as realistic as they are numerous.

The flamethrower was developed

purely as a military weapon and is

no longer in service with the U.S.

Army and Marine Corps. It would be difficult to find any model, let alone

one that works properly. Acquiring the fuel is even more dEcult than

the thrower. But assuming you can find both, you must consider its practical

use. Why cany seven0 pounds of equipment on your back when

only a handful of ghouls are loose? A flamethrower's weight makes it a

liability if you are on the move. Unless you are in a fixed position or have

access to motorized transport, sheer exhaustion will become as dangerous

a threat as the walking dead. Common sense would suggest that a

flamethrower's place on the battlefield is against overwhelming numbers,

swarms of undead numbering in the hundreds if not thousands. If

such a horde were, heaven forbid, to exist, chances are they would be facing

a much larger, well-equipped government force rather than one private

citizen and his trusty (and let's not forget illegal) flamethrower.

 

 

OTHER WEAPONS

Imagination and improvisation are two invaluable assets during

clashes with the living dead. By all means, feel free to regard all the

The Zombie Survival Guide 55

materials around you as a cache of potential weapons. But always keep

in mind a zombie's physiology, and what your homemade device is

likely to accomplish.

 

1. Acm

Apart from fire, sulfuric acid is the best

way to completely destroy a zombie.

Implementing it is another matter. If

somehow you have the means to acquire

or produce large amounts of sulfuric

acid, treat it with the same respect you

would an incendiary weapon. Not only

is this substance as much a danger to

yourself as it is to the undead, the time

it takes to dissolve zombie flesh and

bone is considerable. Acid should be

used as a post-encounter disposal tool

rather than a combat weapon.

 

2. POISON

As there are hundreds of thousands of

lethal compounds in this world, it is

impossible to discuss them all. Instead,

we will review some basic rules that govern the physical and physiological

makeup of the undead. Zombies are immune to all types of

tranquilizers and irritants such as Mace and tear gas. Any compound

designed to halt bodily functions would be equally impotent, as the

undead no longer require these functions. Zombies do not suffer from

heart attacks, nerve paralysis, suffocation, or any other fatal effects

caused by poison.

 

3. BIOLOGICAL WARFARE

Wouldn't it be poetic to destroy beings infected by a virus with another

virus? Unfortunately, this is not an option. %ruses attack only living

cells. They have no effect on the dead.

The same is true for all types of bacteria.

Several laboratory attempts have

been made to culture and spread necmtizing

fasciitis (a flesh-eating bacterial

disease) among captured zombies.

None have proved successful. Experiments

are now under way to grow a new strand of bacterium that

feeds only on dead flesh. Most experts are skeptical of its success.

Tests are ongoing to determine which of the many microorganisms

normally involved in decomposition continue to consume flesh in spite

of its infected nature. If these microbes can be isolated, reproduced,

and delivered in a manner not harmful to its user, they could be humanity's

first weapon of mass destruction in the battle against the living

dead.

 

4. ZOOLOGICAL WARFARE

Hundreds of creatures, great and small, feed on carrion. Employing

some of these animals to devour the dead before they devour the living

might seem the ideal solution. Unfortunately, all species, from hyenas

to fire ants, instinctively avoid zombies. The highly toxic nature of

Solanum appears to be encoded in the survival patterns of the animal

kingdom. This mysterious warning signal that Solanum emits, be it an

odor or some kind of "vibe" long forgotten

by humans, is impossible to

mask by any known substance. (See

"1911 A.D., Vitre, Louisiana," pages

215-16.)

 

5. ELECTROCUTION

As the zombie's muscular system is

basically that of a human, electricity

does have the ability to temporarily stun

or paralyze its body. Lethal results have

been seen only in extreme cases such as power lines used to completely

char a zombie's brain. This is not a "wonder weapon"-the

current that runs through power lines is enough to burn almost any

organic matter, living or undead, to a crisp. It requires twice the voltage

to stun a zombie that it does to stun a human, so common taser

guns are ineffective. Electricity bas been used to create a temporary

banier with water-filled, electrified ditches to keep ghouls paralyzed

long enough for a secondary fatal method to be employed. Several

such incidents have been recorded over the years.

 

6. RADIATION

Experiments are now being conducted to test

the effects of microwaves and other electromagnetic

signals on the brains of the undead, on

the theory that such a device could generate 0

massive, instant, lethal tumors in a zombie's gray matter. Research is

still in its early stages, and results have so far been inconclusive. The

only known instance when zombies came into contact with gamma

radiation occurred during the notorious Khotan Incident. (See "1987

A.D., Khotan, China," pages 234-35.) In this event, the ghouls were

not only unaffected by rads that would have killed humans, but they

threatened to spread their contamination throughout the province.

For the first time, the world glimpsed a new and even deadlier threat:

the radioactive zombie. As much as this sounds like the product

of bad 1950s science fiction, it is, or was, a very real and historically

significant fact. According to records, the radioactive ghouls possessed

no enhanced abilities or magical powers. The threat they

posed lay in their ability to spread deadly radiation to everything

and everyone they touched. Even people who drank from a water

supply the ghouls had touched died soon afterward from radiation

sickness. Fortunately, the outbreak was crushed by the overwhelming

power of the Chinese army. Not only did this solution put an end

to this new danger-it prevented the disaster of the Khotan reactor

going critical.

 

7. GENETIC WARFARE

Some recent proposals recommend a variety of genetic weapons in the

war against the undead. The first step would be to map the genetic

sequence of Solanum. Next, an agent would be developed to rewrite

that sequence, ordering the virus to suspend its attack on human tissue,

turn on itself, or simply self-destruct. Instead of retraining the

zombie, we would retrain the virus that controls the zombie. If successful,

any of these agents would be a revolutionary breakthrough in

combating the undead. Through genetic engineering we could find an

actual cure. Celebration of this breakthrough, however, will have to

wait. The science of genetic therapy is still in its infancy. Even with

media attention and massive financial resources, both of which are

nonexistent, an agent to combat the virus will have to remain a theory.

 

8. NAN~HERAPY

Nanotechnology, the study of microscopic machinery, is only in its

adolescence. At present, experimental computer chips are being made

that are no bigger than a molecule! One day robots that small will be

able to perform tasks within the human body. These nanobots, or whatever

the accepted term will be, will one day destroy cancer cells, repair

damaged tissue, even attack and destroy hostile viruses. Theoretically,

there is no reason why they could not he injected by the billions into

a recently infected human to identify the Solanum virus and eradicate

it from the system. When will this technology be perfected? When will

it find its way into the medical profession? When will it be adapted for

combating Solanum? Only time will tell.

 

 

ARMOR

 

Speed and agility should be your first defense against the walking

dead. Armor will not only decrease both these advantages that you

have over zombies, but it will also sap your energy during prolonged

conflict. Add the risk of dehydration, and the prospect seems even less

The Zombie Sunival Guide 59

attractive. One final, less obvious disadvantage to annor is not physical

but psychological: People wearing protective garb tend to feel more

confident and therefore take greater risks than those in simple clothing.

This artificial bravery has resulted in too many senseless deaths.

Simply put, the best protection from a zombie bite is distance. If for

some reason you insist on some type of protective gear, the following

summary will provide all the information necessq for prudent

decision-making.

 

1. PLATE MAIL

This could be defined as the classic "suit of armor." The term itself

conjures up images of seemingly invincible knights dressed from head

to toe in shining steel. With so much protection, wouldn't one be able

to wander among the undead ranks, taunting them at will with no danger

of repercussion? In truth, standard medieval armor is far from

invulnerable. The leather or metal joints that hold its many pieces

together can be tom apart by an individual's persistent hands, to say

nothing of a mob. Even intact, steel suits are heavy, cumbersome, suffocating,

dehydrating, and extremely noisy. If possible, study and wear

a real suit of armor and practice fighting in it against even one (mock)

attacker. You will find the experience uncomfortable at best, excmciating

at worst. Now imagine five, ten, fifty attackers, all converging on

your position, grabbing at the plates, pulling them in all directions.

Without the speed to outrun them or the agility to avoid them, even the

necessary vision to find and strike them, yon will almost certainly end

up as little more than canned food.

 

2. CHAW Man

If worn from head to toe, this simpler form of armor actually does provide

some protection from zombie bites. Teeth will be unable to penetrate

its links, thereby saving you from infection. Its flexibility allows

for greater movement and speed; its lack of a faceplate allows for

greater visibility. Its vev nature (unlike solid plates) allows the skin to

breathe and thereby cuts down on dehydration and overheating.

Drawbacks, however, are still plentiful. Unless you have been training

with this armor for years, your combat effectiveness is bound to be

impaired. Its weight can still increase exhaustion. Its general discomThe

fort can lead to unwanted distraction, something that must be avoided

in battle. Although chain mail may keep you safe from infection, the

pressure of a zombie bite may still be enough to crack bones, tear muscles,

or rip flesh within the armor. As with plate mail, the clanking of

so many chain links will signal to any nearby zombies that prey has

anived. Unless you want your presence announced, discount this idea

entirely. On a practical note, if you choose chain mail, make sure it is

battle-quality! Much of the medieval or ancient armor produced today

is for decoration or stage performance. For this reason, less expensive

alloys are used in their production. When purchasing your chain mail,

always ensure, through inspection and careful testing, that it can withstand

a zombie's bite.

 

3. THE SHARK SUIT

Although designed for protection against

shark bites, this mesh bodysuit can stand

up to the toughest undead jaws. Made of

either high-tensile steel or titanium, it

provides twice the protection of chain

mail with half the weight. Noise, however,

is still a factor, as well as physical

discomfort and decreased speed and

agility. Shark suits might come in handy

if hunting the dead underwater. (See

"Underwater Battles," pages 144-54.)

 

4. HELMETS

This type of armor would be invaluable

to ghouls, if only they knew enough to

wear them. To humans, they serve no

purpose other than obstructing vision.

Unless your battle is taking place in a

"hard hat area:' avoid this cumbersome

waste of space.

 

 

5. BULLETPROOF VESTS

Because almost all combat-related zombie bites occur on the limbs,

this and other torso armor are a total waste of time. One might consider

a bulletproof vest only in a chaotic situation in which there is a

chance of being shot by your own people. Even in this situation, the

misguided sniper would probably be going for a head shot.

 

6. KEVLAR COVERS

In recent years, law enforcement have begun to equip officers with this

light, ultra-strong material. While thicker, harder plates are used in

vests to stop bullets, a thinner, more flexible version is employed to

stop blades and the occasional guard dog. This new version, if covering

the lower legs and forearms, can help to reduce the risk of zombie

bites in close-quarter situations. If you do acquire Kevlar covers, make

sure to wear them only during battle, and do not draw any false bravery

from them! Many humans in the past have believed that Kevlar or

similar kinds of body armor gave them carte blanche to take unnecessary

risks. No armor in the world can protect a human from that kind

of stupidity. As stated before, your goal is to survive, only survive, and

never be a hero. Bravado in combat is the surest way to endanger yourself

and those around you!

 

7. TIGHT CLOTHES AND SHORT HAIR

Cold, hard figures have shown that when battling the living dead, nothing

has saved more victims than basic, tight clothing and closely

cropped hair. The simple fact is that ghouls attack by reaching out to

grab their victims, pulling them in, then biting. Logic dictates that the

less material a person offers up for grabs, the better his or her chances

will be. Baggy clothing, complete with pockets, straps, or anything

that might hang freely, will be a convenient handle for grasping zombie

claws. Anyone who has worked in factories or with some kind of

heavy machinery will tell yon the importance of never letting anything

hang loose. Tight clothing, obviously within comfort limits, will help

to eliminate this danger. Hair can be a similar hazard. Many times, victims

have been seized and even dragged by their hair to a gruesome

end. Tying one's hair back before a conflict may work temporarily.

However, a short haircut, one inch or shorter, is ideal for hand-to-hand

combat.

Edited by Mortis Nai
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Damn it, Nartwak & Raven have been compromised!

 

And I highly recommend some of you read the actual Zombie Survival Guide as it may just save your life in all this, I keep mine on me at all times.

 

Nartwak may be a zombie, but I'm pretty sure Raven is only a vampire.

 

I keep my copy of the ZSG next to my bed. Makes for some nice bedtime reading. :aiee:"

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Dudes, you should start by defining what a zombie is, how they spread and what its weak points are. I see head boinking and what to use/not to use but no details.

 

For example you may want to tell the dudes if melee's a bad idea because the zombie virus/bacteria and other general infections from decaying flesh would be nasty if it gets on you from fluid contact.

Spreading beauty with my katana.

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Dudes, you should start by defining what a zombie is, how they spread and what its weak points are.  I see head boinking and what to use/not to use but no details.

 

For example you may want to tell the dudes if melee's a bad idea because the zombie virus/bacteria and other general infections from decaying flesh would be nasty if it gets on you from fluid contact.

 

Sorry for the formatting but im not going to type out 30 pages by hand.

 

THE UNDEAD: MYTHS AND REALITIES

 

He comes from the grave, his body a home of worms andjilth. No life in

his eyes, no warmth of his shn, no beating of his breast. His soul, as

empty and dark as the night sky. He laughs at the blade, spits at the

arrow, for they will not harm hisflesh. For eternity, he will walk the

earth, smelling the sweet blood of the living, feasting upon the bones of

the damned. Beware, for he is the living dead.

 

ZOM-BZE: (Zom'be) n. also ZOM-BIES pl. I. An animated corpse that

feeds on living humanjlesh. 2. A voodoo spell that raises the dead. 3.

A Voodoo snake god. 4. One who moves or acts in a daze "like a zombie."

[a word of West African origin]

 

What is a zombie? How are they created? What are their strengths and

weaknesses? What are their needs, their desires? Why are they hostile

to humanity? Before discussing any survival techniques, you must first

learn what you are trying to survive.

We must begin by separating fact from fiction. The walking dead

are neither a work of "black magic" nor any other supernatural force.

Their origin stems from a virus known as Solanum, a Latin word used

by Jan Vanderhaven, who fust "discovered" the disease.

 

SOLANUM: THE VIRUS

 

Solannm works by traveling through the bloodstream, from the initial

point of entry to the brain. Through means not yet fully understood,

the virus uses the cells of the frontal lobe for replication, destroying

them in the process. During this period, all bodily functions cease. By

stopping the heart, the infected subject is rendered ''dead." The brain,

however, remains alive hut dormant, while the virus mutates its cells

into a completely new organ. The most critical trait of this new organ

is its independence from oxygen. By removing the need for this allimportant

resource, the nndead brain can utilize, but is in no way

dependent upon, the complex support mechanism of the human body.

Once mutation is complete, this new organ reanimates the body into a

form that bears little resemblance (physiologically speaking) to the

original corpse. Some bodily functions remain constant, others operate

in a modified capacity, and the remainder shut down completely.

This new organism is a zombie, a member of the living dead.

 

 

1. SOURCE

U~~fortunateleyx, tensive research has yet to find an isolated example

of Solanum in nature. Water, air, and soil in all ecosystems, from all

parts of the world, have turned up negative, as have their accompanying

flora and fauna. At the time of this writing, the search continues.

 

2. SYMPTOMS

The timetable below outlines the process of an infected human (give

or take several hours, depending on the individual).

 

Hour 1: Pain and discoloration (brown-puple) of the infected area Immediate

clotting of the wound @rovided the infection came h m a wound).

Hour 5: Fever (99-103 degrees F), chills, slight dementia, vomiting,

acute pain in the joints.

Hour 8: Numbing of extremities and infected area, increased fever

(103-106 degrees F), increased dementia, loss of muscular coordination.

Hour 11: Paralysis in the lower body, overall numbness, slowed heart

rate.

Hour 16: Coma.

Hour 20: Heart stoppage. Zero brain activity

Hour 23: Reanimation.

 

 

3. TRANSFERENCE

 

Solanum is 100 percent communicahle and 100 percent fatal.

Fortunately for the human race, the virus is neither waterborne nor airborne.

Humans have never been known to contract the virus from elements

in nature. Infection can occur only through direct fluidic

contact. A zombie bite, although by far the most recognizable means

of transference, is by no means the only one. Humans have been

infected by brushing their open wounds against those of a zombie or

by being splattered by its remains after an explosion. Ingestion of

infected flesh (provided the person has no open mouth sores), however,

results in pemanent death rather than infection. Infected flesh has

proven to be highly toxic.

 

No infomation-historical, experimental, or othenvise-has surfaced

regarding the results of sexual relations with an undead specimen,

but as previously noted, the nature of Solanum suggests a high

danger of infection. Warning against such an act would be useless, as

the only people deranged enough to try would he unconcerned for their

own safety. Many have argued that, given the congealed nature of

undead bodily fluids, the chances of infection from a non-bite contact

should be low. However, it must be remembered that even one organism

is enough to begin the cycle.

 

 

4. CROSS-SPECIES INFECTION

 

Solannm is fatal to all living creatures, regardless of size, species, or

ecosystem. Reanimation, however, takes place only in humans. Studies

have shown that Solanum infecting a non-human brain will die within

hours of the death of its host, making the carcass safe to handle.

Infected animals expire before the virus can replicate throughout their

bodies. Infection from insect bites such as from mosquitoes can also

he discounted. Experiments have proven that all parasitic insects can

sense and will reject an infected host 100 percent of the time.

 

 

5. TREATMENT

 

Once a human is infected, little can be done to save him or her. Because

Solanum is a virus and not a bacteria, antibiotics have no effect.

Immunization, the only way to combat a virus, is equally useless, as even

the most minute dosage will lead to a full-blown infection. Genetic

research is under way. Goals range from stronger human antibodies to

resistant cell structure to a counter-virus designed to identify and destroy

Solanum. This and other, more radical treatments are still in the earliest

stages, with no foreseeable success in the near future. Battlefield experiences

have led to the immediate severing of the infected limb (provided

this is the location of the bite), but such treatments are dubious at best,

with less than a 10 percent success rate.

 

Chances are, the infected human

was doomed from the moment the virus entered his or her system.

Should the infected human choose suicide, he should remember that the

brain must be eliminated first. Cases have been recorded in which

recently infected subjects, deceased by means other than the virus, will

nonetheless reanimate. Such cases usually occur when the subject

expires after the fifth hour of infection. Regardless, any person killed

after being bitten or otherwise infected by the undead should be immediately

disposed of. (See "Disposal," page 19.)

 

 

6. REANIMATING THE ALREADY DECEASED

 

It has been suggested that fresh human corpses could reanimate if

Solanum were introduced after their demise. This is a fallacy. Zombies

ignore necrotic flesh and therefore could not transfer the virus.

Experiments conducted during and after World War I1 (see "Recorded

Attacks," pages 216m have proven that injecting Solanum into a

cadaver would be futile because a stagnant bloodstream could not

transport the virus to the brain. Injection directly into a dead brain

would be equally useless, as the expired cells could not respond to the

virus. Solanum does not create life-it alters it.

 

 

ZOMBIE ATTRIBUTES

 

1. PHYSICAL ABILITIES

Too often, the undead have been said to possess superhuman powers:

unusual strength, lightning speed, telepathy, etc. Stories range from

zombies flying through the air to their scaling vertical surfaces like spiders.

While these traits might make for fascinating drama, the individual

ghoul is far from a magical, omnipotent demon. Never forget that

the body of the undead is, for all practical purposes, human. What

changes do occur are in the way this new, reanimated body is used by

the now-infected brain. There is no way a zombie could fly unless the

human it used to be could fly. The same goes for projecting force

fields, telepottation, moving through solid objects, transforming into a

wolf, breathing fire, or a variety of other mystical talents amibuted to

the walking dead. Imagine the human body as a tool kit. The somnambulist

brain has those tools, and only those tools, at its disposal. It

cannot create new ones out of thin air. But it can, as you will see, use

these tools in unconventional combinations, or push their durability

beyond normal human limits.

 

 

A. Sight

 

The eyes of a zombie are no different than those of a normal human.

While still capable (given their rate of decomposition) of transmitting

visual signals to the brain, how the brain interprets these signals is

another matter. Studies are inconclusive regarding the undead's visual

abilities. They can spot prey at distances comparable to a human, but

whether they can distinguish a human from one of their own is still up

for debate. One theory suggests that the movements made by humans,

which are quicker and smoother than those of the undead, is what

causes them to stand out to the zombie eye. Experiments have been

done in which humans have attempted to confuse approaching ghouls

by mimicking their motions and adopting a shambling, awkward limp.

To date, none of these attempts have succeeded. It has been suggested

that zombies possess night vision, a fact that explains their skill at nocturnal

hunting. This theory has been debunked by the fact that all zombies

are expert night feeders, even those without eyes.

 

B. Sound

 

There is no question that zombies have excellent hearing. Not only can

they detect sound-they can determine its direction. The basic range

appears to be the same as that for humans. Experiments with extreme

high and low frequencies have yielded negative results. Tests have also

shown that zombies are attracted by any sounds, not just those made

by living creatures. It has been recorded that ghouls will notice sounds

ignored by living humans. The most likely, if unproven, explanation is

that zombies depend on all their senses equally. Humans are sightoriented

from birth, depending on other senses only if the primary one

is lost. Perhaps this is not a handicap shared by the walking dead. If

so, it would explain their ability to hunt, fight, and feed in total darkness.

 

 

C. Smell

 

Unlike with sound, the undead have a more acute sense of smell. In

both combat situations and laboratory tests, they have been able to distinguish

the smell of living prey above all others. In many cases, and

given ideal wind conditions, zomhies have been known to smell fresh

corpses from a distance of more than a mile. Again, this does not mean

that ghouls have a greater sense of smell than humans, simply that they

rely on it more. It is not known exactly what particular secretion signals

the presence of prey: sweat, pheromones, blood, etc. In the past,

people seeking to move undetected through infested areas have

attempted to "mask" their human scent with perfumes, deodorants, or

other strong-smelling chemicals. None were successful. Experiments

are now under way to synthesize the smells of living creatures as a

decoy or even repellent to the walking dead. A successful product is

still years away.

 

 

D. Taste

 

Little is known about the altered taste buds of the walking dead.

Zombies do have the ability to tell human flesh apart from that of animals,

and they prefer the former. Ghouls also have a remarkable ability

to reject carrion in favor of freshly killed meat. A human body that

has been dead longer than twelve to eighteen hours will be rejected as

food. The same goes for cadavers that have been embalmed or otherwise

preserved. Whether this has anything to do with "taste" is not yet

certain. It may have to do with smell or, perhaps, another instinct that

has not been discovered. As to exactly why human flesh is preferable,

science has yet to find an answer to this confounding, frustrating, terrifying

question.

 

 

E. Touch

 

Zombies have, literally, no physical sensations. All nerve receptors

throughout the body remain dead after reanimation. This is truly their

greatest and most temfying advantage over the living. We, as humans,

have the ability to experience physical pain as a signal of bodily damage.

Our brain classifies such sensations, matches them to the experience

that instigated them, and then files the information away for use

as a warning against future ham. It is this gift of physiology and

instinct that has allowed us to survive as a species. It is why we value

virtues such as courage, which inspires people to perform actions

despite warnings of danger. The inability to recognize and avoid pain

is what makes the waking dead so formidable. Wounds will not be

noticed and, therefore, will not deter an attack. Even if a zombie's

body is severely damaged, it will continue to attack until nothing

remains.

 

 

E Sixth Sense

 

Historical research, coupled with laboratory and field observation,

have shown that the walking dead have been known to attack even

when all their sensory organs have been damaged or completely

decomposed. Does this mean that zombies possess a sixth sense?

Perhaps. Living humans use less than 5 percent of their brain capacity.

It is possible that the virus can stimulate another sensoly ability that

has been forgotten by evolution. This theory is one of the most hotly

debated in the war against the undead. So far, no scientific evidence

has been found to suppoa either side.

 

 

G. Healing

 

Despite legends and ancient folklore, undead physiology has been

proven to possess no powers of regeneration. Cells that are damaged

stay damaged. Any wounds, no matter what their size and nature, will

remain for the duration of that body's reanimation. A variety of medical

treatments have been attempted to stimulate the healing process in

captured ghouls. None were successful. This inability to self-repair,

something that we as living beings take for granted, is a severe disadvantage

to the undead. For example, every time we physically exert

ourselves, we tear our muscles. With time, these muscles rebuild to a

stronger state than before. A ghoul's muscle mass will remain damaged,

reducing its effectiveness every time it is used.

 

 

H. Decomposition

 

The average zombie "life span"-how long it is able to function before

completely rotting away-is estimated at three to five years. As fantastic

as this sounds-a human corpse able to ward off the natural

effects of decay-its cause is rooted in basic biology. When a human

body dies, its flesh is immediately set upon by billions of microscopic

organisms. These organisms were always present, in the external environment

arid within the body itself. In life, the immune system stood

as a harrier between these organisms and their target. In death, that barrier

is removed. The organisms begin multiplying exponentially as

they proceed to eat and, thereby, break down the corpse on a cellular

level. The smell and discoloration associated with any decaying meat

are the biological process of these microbes at work. When you order

an "aged" steak, you are ordering a piece of meat that has begun to rot,

its formerly toughened flesh softened by microorganisms breaking

down its sturdy fiber. Within a short time, that steak, like a human

corpse, will dissolve to nothing, leaving behind only material too hard

or innutritious for any microbe, such as hone, teeth, nails, and hair.

This is the normal cycle of life, nature's way of recycling nutrients

back into the food chain. To halt this process, and preserve dead tissue,

it is necessary to place it in an environment unsuitable for bacteria,

such as in extreme low or high temperatures, in toxic chemicals

such as formaldehyde, or, in this case, to saturate it with Solanum.

Almost all the microbe species involved in normal human decomposition

have repeatedly rejected flesh infected by the virus, effecThe

tively embalming the zombie. Were this not the case, combating the

living dead would be as easy as avoiding them for several weeks or

even days until they rotted away to hones. Research has yet to discover

the exact cause of this condition. It has been determined that at least

some microbe species ignore the repelling effects of Solanum-otherwise,

the undead would remain perfectly preserved forever. It has also

been determined that natural conditions such as moisture and temperature

play an important role as well. Undead that prowl the bayous of

Louisiana are unlikely to last as long as those in the cold, dry Gobi

desert. Extreme situations, such as deep freezing or immersion in -

preservative fluid, could, hypothetically, allow an undead specimen to

exist indef~telyT. hese techniques have been known to allow zombies

to function for decades, if not centuries. (See "Recorded Attacks,"

pages 193ff.) Decomposition does not mean that a member of the

walking dead will simply drop. Decay may affect various parts of the

body at different times. Specimens have been found with brains intact

but nearly disintegrated bodies. Others with partially rotted brains may

control some bodily functions but be completely paalyzed in others.

A popular theory has recently circulated that attempts to explain the

story of the ancient Egyptian mummy as one of the first examples of

an embalmed zombie. The preservation techniques allowed it to fuuction

several thousand years after being entombed. Anyone with a rudimentary

knowledge of ancient Egypt would find this story almost

laughably untrue: The most important and complicated step in preparing

a pharaoh for burial was the removal of the brain!

 

 

I. Digestion

 

Recent evidence has once and for all mscounted the theory that human

flesh is the fuel for the undead. A zombie's digestive tract is completely

dormant. The complex system that processes food, extracts nutrition,

and excretes waste does not factor into a zombie's physiology. Autopsies

conducted on neutralized undead have shown that their "food" lies in its

original, undigested state at all sections of the tract. This partially

chewed, slowly rotting matter will continue to accumulate, as the zom12

hie devours more victims, until it is forced through the anus, or literally

bursts through the stomach or intestinal lining. While this more dramatic

example of non-digestion is rare, hundreds of eyewitness reports have

confirmed undead to have distended bellies. One captured and dissected

specimen was found to contain 21 1 pounds of flesh within its system!

Even rarer accounts have confirmed that zombies continue to feed long

after their digestive tracts have exploded from within.

 

 

J. Respiration

 

The lungs of the undead continue to function in that they draw air into

and expel it from the hody. This function accounts for a zombie's signature

moan. What the lungs and body chemistry fail to accomplish,

however, is to extract oxygen and remove carbon dioxide. Given that

Solanum obviates the need for both of these functions, the entire

human respiratory system is obsolete in the hody of a ghoul. This

explains how the living dead can "walk underwater" or survive in environments

lethal to humans. Their brains, as noted earlier, are oxygenindependent.

 

 

K. Circulation

 

It would be inaccurate to say that zomhies have no heart. It would not

he inaccurate, however, to say that they find no use for it. The circulatory

system of the undead is little more than a network of useless tubes

filled with congealed hlood. The same applies to the lymphatic system

as well as all other bodily fluids. Although this mutation would appear

to give the undead one more advantage over humanity, it has actually

proved to he a godsend. The lack of fluid mass prevents easy transmission

of the virus. Were this not true, hand-to-hand combat would

he nearly impossible, as the defending human would almost certainly

he splattered with hlood andlor other fluids.

 

 

L. Reproduction

 

Zombies are sterile creatures. Their sexual organs are necrotic and

impotent. Attempts have been made to fertilize zombie eggs with

human sperm and vice versa. None has been succcssful. The undead

have also shown no signs of sexual desire, either for their own

species or for the living. Until research can prove otherwise, humanity's

greatest fear-the dead reproducing the dead-is a comforting

impossibility.

 

M. Strength

 

Ghouls possess the same brute force as the living. What power can be

exerted depends greatly on the individual zombie. What muscle mass

a person has in life would be all he possesses in death. Unlike a living

body, adrenal glands have not been known to function in the dead,

denying zombies the temporary burst of power we humans enjoy. The

one solid advantage the living dead do possess is amazing stamina.

Imagine working out, or any other act of physical exertion. Chances

are that pain and exhaustion will dictate your limits. These factors do

not apply to the dead. They will continue an act, with the same

dynamic energy, until the muscles supporting it literally disintegrate.

i

f While this makes for progressively weaker ghouls, it allows for an allpowerful

first attack. Many barricades that would have exhausted three 1 or even four physically fit humans have fallen to a single determined

zombie.

 

N. Speed

 

The "walking" dead tend to move at a slouch or limp. Even without

injuries or advanced decomposition, their lack of coordination makes

for an unsteady suide. Speed is mainly determined by leg length. Taller

ghouls have longer strides than their shorter counterparts. Zombies

appear to be incapable of running. The fastest have been observed to

move at a rate of barely one step per 1.5 seconds. Again, as with

strength, the dead's advantage over the living is their tirelessness.

Humans who believe they have outrun their nndead pursuers might do

well to remember the story of the tortoise and the hare, adding, of

course, that in this instance the hare stands a good chance of being

eaten alive.

 

 

0. Agility

 

The average living human possesses a dexterity level 90 percent

greater than the strongest ghoul. Some of this comes from the general

stiffness of necrotic muscle tissue (hence their awkward stride). The

rest is due to their primitive brain functions. Zomhies have little handeye

coordination, one of their greatest weaknesses. No one has ever

observed a zombie jumping, either from one spot to another or simply

up and down. Balancing on a narrow surface is similarly beyond their

ahility. Swimming is also a skill reserved for the living. The theory has

been put forth that, if an undead corpse were to he bloated enough to

rise to the surface, it could present a floating hazard. This is rare, however,

as the slow rate of decomposition would not allow by-product gas

to accumulate. Zombies who walk or fall into bodies of water will

more likely find themselves wandering aimlessly across the bottom

until eventually dissolving. They can be successful climbers, but only

in certain circumstances. If zombies perceive prey above them, for

example, in the second story of a house, they will always attempt to

climb to it. Zombies will try to scale any surface no matter how

unfeasahle or even impossible. In all but the easiest situations, these

attempts have met with failure. Even in the case of ladders, when simple

hand-over-hand coordination is required, only one in four zombies

will succeed.

 

 

2. BEHAWOWLPA TTERNS

 

A. Intelligence

 

It has been proven, time and again, that our greatest advantage over the

undead is our ahility to think. The mental capacity of the average zombie

ranks somewhere beneath that of an insect. On no occasion have

they shown any ability to reason or employ logic. Attempting to

accomplish a task, failing, then by trial and error discovering a new

solution, is a skill shared by many members of the animal kingdom hut

lost on the walking dead. Zombies have repeatedly failed laboratory

intelligence tests set at the level of rodents. One field case showed a

human standing at one end of a collapsed bridge with several dozen

zombies on the orher side. One by one, the walking dead tumbled over

the edge in a futile attempt to reach him. At no time did any of them

realize what was happening and change their tactics in any way.

Contrruy to myth and speculation, zombies have never been observed

using tools of any kind. Even picking up a rock to use as a weapon is

beyond their grasp. This simple task would prove the basic thought

process involved in realizing that the rock is a more efficient weapon

than the naked hand. Ironically, the age of artificial intelligence has

enabled us to identify more easily with the mind of the zombie than

that of our more "primitive" ancestors. With care exceptions, even the

most advanced computers do not have the ability to think on their own.

They do what they are programmed to do, nothing more. Imagine a

computer programmed to execute one function. This function cannot

be paused, modified, or erased. No new data can be stored. No new

commands can he installed. This computer will perform that one function,

over and over, until its power source eventually shuts down. This

is the zombie brain. An instinct-driven, unitask machine that is impervious

to tampering and can only be destroyed.

 

B. Emotions

 

Feelings of any kind are not known to the walking dead. Every form

of psychological warfare, from attempts at enraging the undead to provoking

pity have all met with disaster. Joy, sadness, confidence, anxiety,

love, hatred, fear-all of these feelings and thousands more that

make up the human "heart" are as useless to the living dead as the

organ of the same name. Who knows if this is humanity's greatest

weakness or strength? The debate continues, and probably will forever.

 

 

C. Memories

 

A modem conceit is that a zombie retains the knowledge of its former

life. We hear stories of the dead returning to their places of residence

or work, operating familiar machinery, or even showing acts of mercy

to loved ones. In trnth, not a shred of proof exists to support this wishful

thinking. Zombies could not possibly retain memories of their for

mer lives in either the conscious or subconscious mind, because neither

exist! A ghoul will not be distracted by the family pet, living relatives,

familiar surroundings, etc. No matter who a person was in his

former life, that person is gone, replaced by a mindless automaton with

no instinct other than for feeding. This begs the question: Why do zombies

prefer urban areas to the countryside? First, the undead do not prefer

cities, but simply remain where they are reanimated. Second, the

main reason zomhies tend to stay in cities instead of fanning out into

the countryside is because an urban zone holds the highest concentration

of prey.

 

 

D. Physical Needs

 

Other than hunger (discussed later), the dead have shown none of the

physical wants or needs expressed in mortal life. Zombies have never

been observed to sleep or rest under any circumstances. They have not

reacted to extreme heat or cold. In harsh weather, they have never

sought shelter. Even something as simple as thirst is unknown to the

living dead. Defying all laws of science, Solanum has created what

could be described as a completely self-sufficient organism.

 

 

E. Communication

 

Zombies have no language skills. Although their vocal cords are capable

of speech, their brain is not. The only vocal ability appears to be a

deep-throated moan. This moan is released when zombies identify prey.

The sound will remain low and steady until physical contact is made. It

will then shift in tone and volume as the zombie commences its attack.

This eerie sound, so typically associated with the walking dead, serves

as a rallying cry for other zombies and, as has been recently discovered,

is a potent psychological weapon. (See "On the Defense," page 74.)

E Social Dynamics Theories have always proliferated that the

undead function as a collective

force, from an army controlled by Satan to an insect-like

pheromone-driven hive to the most recent notion that they achieve

group consensus by telepathy. The truth is that zombies have no social

organization to speak of. There is no hierarchy, no chain of command,

no drive toward any type of collectivization. A horde of the undead,

regardless of size, regardless of appearance, is simply a mass of individuals.

If several hundred ghouls converge on a victim's location, it

is because each one is drawn by its own instinct. Zombies appear to be

unaware of one another. Individuals have never been observed to react

to the sight of one another at any range. This goes back to the question

of sense: How does a zombie distinguish between one of its own and

a human or other prey at the same range? The answer has yet to he

found. Zombies do avoid one another in the same way they avoid inanimate

objects. When they hump into one another, they make no attempt

to connect or communicate. Zombies feasting on the same corpse will

tug repeatedly on the meat in question rather than shove a competitor

out of the way. The only suggestion of communal effort is seen in notorious

swarm attacks: the moan of a ghoul calling others within earshot.

Once they hear the wail, other walking dead will almost always converge

on its source. An early study theorized that this was a deliberate

act, that a scout used its moan to signal the others to attack. However,

we now how that it happens purely by accident. The ghoul that moans

at the detection of prey does so as an instinctive reaction, not as an alert.

 

 

G. Hunting

 

Zombies are migratory organisms, with no regard for temtory or concept

of home. They will travel miles and perhaps, given time, cross

continents in their search for food. Their hunting pattern is random.

Ghouls will feed at night and during the day. They will stumble

through an area rather than deliberately searching it. Certain zones or

structures will not he singled out as more likely to contain prey. For

example, some have been known to search farmhouses and other rural

structures while others in the same group have moved by without even

a glance. Urban zones take more time to explore, which is why the

undead remain longer in these areas, hut no building will take precedence

over another. Zombies appear to be totally unaware of their sur

roundings. They do not, for example, move their eyes in a way that

would take in the information of a new setting. Shuffling silently, with

a thousand-yard stare, they will wander aimlessly, regardless of location,

until prey is detected. As discussed earlier, the undead possess an

uncauny ability to home in on a victim's precise location. Once contact

is made, the previously silent, oblivious automaton transforms into

something more closely related to a guided missile. The head turns

immediately in the direction of its victim. The jaw drops, lips retract,

and, from the depths of its diaphragm, comes the moan. Once contact

is made, zombies cannot be distracted by any means. They will continue

to pursue their prey, stopping only if they lose contact, make a

successful kill, or are destroyed.

 

 

H. Motivation

 

Why do the undead prey upon the living? If it has been proven that

human flesh serves no nutritional purpose, why does their instinct

drive them to murder? The truth eludes us. Modem science, combined

with historical data, has shown that living humans are not the only

delights on the undead menu. Rescue teams entering an infested area

have consistently reported them stripped of all life. Any creatures, no

matter what their size or species, will he consumed by an attacking

zombie. Human flesh, however, will always he preferable to other life

forms. One experiment presented a captured specimen with two identical

cubes of meat: one human, one animal. The zombie repeatedly

chose the human. Reasons for this are still unknown. What can be confirmed,

beyond any shadow of doubt, is that instinct brought on by

Solanum drives the undead to kill and devour any living creature they

discover. There appear to be no exceptions.

 

 

I. Killing the Dead

While destroying a zombie may be simple, it is far from easy. As we

have seen, zombies require none of the physiological functions that

humans need to survive. Destruction or severe damage of the circulatory,

digestive, or respiratory system would do nothing to a member of

the walking dead, as these functions no

longer support the brain. Simply put, there

are thousands of ways to kill a humanand

only one to kill a zombie. The brain

must be obliterated, by any means possible.

 

 

J. Disposal

 

Studies have shown that Solanum can still

inhabit the body of a terminated zombie for

up to fortyeight hours. Exercise extreme

care when disposing of undead corpses.

The head in particular possesses the most

serious hazard, given its concentration of

the virus. Never handle an undead corpse

without protective clothing. Treat it as you

would any toxic, highly lethal material. Cremation is the safest, most

effective way of disposal. Despite rumors that a pile of burning corpses

will spread Solannm in a cloud of smoking plague, common sense

would dictate that any virus is unable to survive intense heat, to say

nothing of an open flame.

 

 

K. Domestication?

 

To reiterate, the zombie brain has proved, so far, to he tamper-proof.

Experiments ranging from chemicals to surgery to electromagnetic

waves have yielded negative results. Behavioral modification therapy

and other such attempts to train the living dead like some kind of pack

animal have similarly met with failure. Again, the machine cannot be

rewired. It will exist as is, or it will not exist at all.

 

 

THE VOODOO ZOMBIE

 

If zombies are the creation of a virus and not black magic, then how

does this explain the so-called "voodoo zombie," a person who has died,

been raised from his grave, and is doomed to spend eternity as a slave

of the living? Yes, it is trne that the word "zombie" originally comes

from the Kimbnndn word "nzfimbe," a term describing a dead person's

soul, and yes, zombies and zombification are integral parts of the Afro-

Caribbean religion known as voodoo. However, the origin of their name

is the only similarity between the voodoo zombie and the viral zombie.

Although it is said that voodoo houngans (priests) can turn humans into

zombies by magical means, the practice is rooted in bard, undeniable

science. "Zombie powder," the tool used by the houngan for zombification,

contains a very powerful neurotoxin (the exact ingredients are a

closely guarded secret). The toxin temporarily paralyzes the human

nervous system, creating a state of extreme hibernation. With the heart,

lungs, and all other bodily functions operating at minimal levels, it

would be understandable if an inexperienced coroner declared the paralyzed

subject to be dead. Many humans have been buried while in such

a state, only to awaken screaming in the pitch darkness of their coffin.

So what makes this living human being a zombie? The answer is simple:

brain damage. Many who are buried alive quickly use up the air

inside their coffins. Those that are recovered (if they are lucky) almost

always suffer brain damage from lack of oxygen. These poor souls

shamble about with little cognitive skills, or, indeed, free will, and are

often mistaken for the living dead. How can yon distinguish a voodoo

zombie from the genuine article? The telltale signs are obvious.

 

1. Voodoo zombies show emotion. People suffering from zombie

powder-induced brain damage are still capable of all normal human

feelings. They smile, cry, even growl with anger if hurt or otherwise

provoked (something real zombies would never do).

 

2. Voodoo zombies exhibit thought. As has been stated before, when

a real zombie encounters you it will immediately home in like a

smart bomb. A voodoo zombie will take a moment to try to figure

out who or what you are. Maybe it will come toward you, maybe it

will recoil, maybe it will continue its observation as its damaged

brain attempts to analyze the information given it. What a voodoo

zombie will not do is raise its arms, drop its jaw, unleash a hellish

moan, and stumble directly toward you.

 

3. Voodoo zombies feel pain. A voodoo zombie that trips and falls

will undoubtedly hold its bruised knee and whimper. Likewise, one

already suffering from some other wound will nurse it, or, at the

very least, be aware of the wound's existence. Voodoo zombies will

not ignore deep gashes in their bodies like a real zombie would.

 

4. Voodoo zombies recognize fire. This is not to say that they are afraid

of open flames. Some that have suffered severe brain damage may not

remember what lire is. They will stop to examine it, perhaps even reach

out to touch it, hut they will recoil once they realize it causes pain.

 

5. Voodoo zombies recognize their surroundings. Unlike real zombies,

who only recognize prey, voodoo zombies will react to sudden

changes in light, sound, taste, and smell. Voodoo zombies have been

observed watching television or brightly flashing lights, listening to

music, cringing at thunder, and even taking notice of one another.

This last fact has been critical in several cases of mis-identification.

Had the zombies in question not reacted to each other (they looked

at each other, made noises, even touched each other's faces), they

might have been accidentally exterminated.

 

6. Voodoo zombies do NOT have bypersense. A human who has suffered

the debilitating effects of zombie powder is still a sightdependent

human. He cannot operate perfectly in the dark, hear a

footstep at 500 ya~dso, r smell a living being on the wind. Voodoo

zombies can actually be surprised by someone walking up behind

them. This is not recommended, however, as a frightened zombie

might react in anger.

 

7. Voodoo zombies can communicate. While this is not always the

case, many of these individuals can respond to audiovisual signals.

Many understand words; some even comprehend simple sentences.

Many voodoo zombies possess the ability to speak, simply, of

course, and rarely for extended conversations.

 

8. Voodoo zombies can be controlled. While not always true, many

brain damaged humans have lost much of their self-realization,

making them very susceptible to suggestion. Simply shouting for a

subject to halt or even go away can he enough to get rid of a voodoo

zombie. This has created the dangerous situation of confused people

believing they could control or train true zombies. Several times

headstrong humans have insisted they could simply command their

living dead attackers to stop. As cold, rotting hands grabbed their

limbs and dirty, worn teeth bit into their flesh, these people discovered,

too late, what they were truly dealing with.

 

These guidelines should give you a good idea of how to tell a voodoo

zombie from a true zombie. One final note: Voodoo zombies are

almost always encountered in sub-Saharan Africa, the Caribbean,

Central and South America, and the southern United States.

Although it is not impossible to find someone who has been turned

into a zombie by a houngan elsewhere, the chances of such an

encounter are slim.

 

 

THE HOLLYWOOD ZOMBIE

Since the living dead first stepped onto the silver screen, their greatest

enemy has not been hunters, but critics. Scholars, scientists, even concerned

citizens have all argued that these movies depict the living dead

in a fantastic, unrealistic fashion. Visually stunning weapons, physically

impossible action sequences, larger-than-life human characters,

and, above all, magical, invincible, even comical ghouls have all added

their colors to the controversial rainbow that is "the Zombie Movie."

Further criticism argues that this "style over substance" approach to

somnambulist cinema teaches human viewers lessons that may get

them killed in a real encounter. These serious charges demand an

equally serious defense. While some zombie movies are based on

actual events*, their goal, indeed the goal of almost every movie in

every genre, has always been, first and foremost, to entertain. Unless

we are discussing pure documentaries (and even some of those are

"sweetened"), moviemakers must take some artistic license to make

their work more palatable to the audience. Even movies that are based

on actual events will sacrifice pure reality for good storytelling.

 

Certain characters will be an amalgam of real-life individuals. Others

may be purely fictional in order to explain certain facts, facilitate the

plotline, or simply add flavor to the scene. One might argue that the

role of the artist is to challenge, educate, and enlighten her audience.

That may be true, but try imparting knowledge to an audience who has

either left or fallen asleep within the first ten minutes of the picture.

Accept this basic rule of moviemaking and you will understand why

Hollywood zombie films stray, in some cases wildly, from the reality

on which they are based. In short, use these photo-plays as their makers

intended: as a source of temporary, lighthearted entertainment and

not a visual aid to your survival.

 

 

OUTBREAKS

 

Although each zombie attack is different, given the number, terrain,

reaction of the general populace, etc., its level of intensity can be measured

in four distinct classes.

*At the behest of the filmmakers andlor their estates, the titles of those movies based on me-life stories have been omitted.

 

CLASS 1

This is a low-level outbreak, usually in a Third World country or First

World rural area. The number of zombies in this class of outbreak

ranges between one and twenty. Total human casualties (including

those infected) range from one to fifty. The total duration, from the fist

case to the last (known), will range between twenty-four hours and

fourteen days. The infested area will be small, no larger than a twentymile

radius. In many cases, natural boundaries will determine its limits.

Response will he light, either exclusively civilian or with some

additional help from local law enforcement. Media coverage will be

light, if present at all. If the media is present, look for common stories

like homicides or "accidents." This is the most common type of outbreak

and also the easiest to go unnoticed.

 

CLASS 2

Urban or densely populated mral areas are included in this level of outbreak.

Total zombies will range between twenty and one hundred.

Total human casualties may reach as high as several hundred. The

duration of a Class 2 attack may last no longer than a Class 1 outbreak.

In some cases, the larger number of zombies will spark a more immediate

response. A rural, sparsely populated outbreak may extend to a

hundred-mile radius, while an urban outbreak may encompass only

several blocks. Suppression will almost certainly be organized. Bands

of civilians will be replaced by local, state, even federal law enforcement.

Look for an additional, if low-level, military response, the

National Guard in the United States or its equivalent abroad. Most

often, so as to ease panic, these units will take a more noncombatant

role, providing medical assistance, crowd control, and logistical support.

Class 2 outbreaks almost always attract the press. Unless the

attack occurs in a huly isolated area of the world, or one where the

media is strictly controlled, the story will he reported. This does not

mean, however, that it will be reported acc~lrately.

 

CLASS 3

A hue crisis. Class 3 outbreaks, more than any other, demonstrate the

clear threat posed by the living dead. Zombies will number in the thousands,

encompassing an area of several hundred miles. The duration of

the attack and a possible lengthy mop-up process could last as long as

several months. There will be no chance for a press blackout or coverup.

Even without media attention, the sheer magnitude of the attack will

leave too many eyewitnesses. This is a full-blown battle, with law

enforcement replaced by units of the regular military. A state of emergency

will be declared for the infested zone, as well as the neighboring

areas. Expect martial law, restricted travel, rationed supplies, federalized

services, and strictly monitored communication. All these measures,

however, will take time to implement. The initial phase will be

one of chaos as those in power come to grips with the crisis. Riots, looting,

and widespread panic will add to their difficulties, further delaying

an effective response. While this is happening, those living withm the

infested area will be at the mercy of the undead. Isolated, abandoned,

and surrounded by ghouls, they will have only themselves to depend on.

 

CLASS 4

(See "Living in an Undead World," pages 154-81.)

 

DETECTION

Every undead outbreak, regardless of its class, has a beginning. Now

that the enemy has been defined, the next step is early warning.

Knowing what a zombie is will not help if you are unable to recognize

an outbreak before it's too late. This does not entail building a "zombie

command post" in your basement, sticking pins in a map, and huddling

around the shortwave radio. All it requires is looking for signs

that would slip by the untrained mind. These signs include:

 

1. Homicides in which the victims were executed by head shots or

decapitation. It has happened many times: People recognize an outbreak

for what it is and try to take matters into their own hands.

Almost always, these people are declared murderers by the local

authorities and prosecuted as such.

 

2. Missing persons, particularly in wilderness or uninhabited areas.

Pay careful attention if one or more of the search members end up

missing. If the story is televised or photographed, watch to see what

level of armament the search parties carry. Any more than one rifle

per group could mean that this is more than just a simple rescue

operation.

 

3. Cases of "violent insanity" in which the subject attacked friends or

family without the use of weapons. Find out if the attacker bit or

tried to bite his victims. If so, are any of the victims still in the hospital?

Try to discover if any of these victims mysteriously died

within days of their bite.

 

4. Riots or other civil disturbances that began without provocation or

other logical cause. Common sense will dictate that violence on any

group level does not simply occur without a catalyst such as racial

tension, political actions, or legal decisions. Even so-called "mass

hysteria" can always be traced to a root source. If none can be

found, the answer may lie elsewhere.

 

5. Disease-based deaths in which either the cause is undetermined or

seems highly suspect. Deaths from infectious disease are rare in the

industrialized world, compared to a century ago. For this reason,

new outbreaks always make the news. Look for those cases in

which the exact nature of the disease is unexplained. Also, be on the

alert for suspicious explanations such as West Nile virus or "mad

cow" disease. Either could be examples of a cover-up.

 

6. Any of the above in which media coverage was forbidden. A total

press blackout is rare in the United States. The occurrence of one

should be regarded as an immediate red flag. Of course, there may

be many reasons other than an attack of the living dead. Then again,

any event causing a govemment as media-conscious as our own to

clamp down merits close attention. The truth, no matter what it is,

cannot be good.

 

Once an event has tripped your sensors, keep track of it. Note the

location, and its distance from you. Watch for similar incidents around

or near the original site. If, within a few days or weeks, these incidents

do occur, study them carefully. Note the response of law enforcement

and other govemment agencies. If they react more forcefully with each

occurrence, chances are that an outbreak is unfolding.

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Dudes, you should start by defining what a zombie is, how they spread and what its weak points are.  I see head boinking and what to use/not to use but no details.

 

For example you may want to tell the dudes if melee's a bad idea because the zombie virus/bacteria and other general infections from decaying flesh would be nasty if it gets on you from fluid contact.

 

Sorry for the formatting but im not going to type out 30 pages by hand.

 

[snip]Horrendously long post about zombies.[/snip]

 

So you decided to copy past all 30 pages instead? :aiee:

Edited by Deraldin
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