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Funny Stuff: Return of the Funny


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udlvyy10vmt51.png

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The words freedom and liberty, are diminishing the true meaning of the abstract concept they try to explain. The true nature of freedom is such, that the human mind is unable to comprehend it, so we make a cage and name it freedom in order to give a tangible meaning to what we dont understand, just as our ancestors made gods like Thor or Zeus to explain thunder.

 

-Teknoman2-

What? You thought it was a quote from some well known wise guy from the past?

 

Stupidity leads to willful ignorance - willful ignorance leads to hope - hope leads to sex - and that is how a new generation of fools is born!


We are hardcore role players... When we go to bed with a girl, we roll a D20 to see if we hit the target and a D6 to see how much penetration damage we did.

 

Modern democracy is: the sheep voting for which dog will be the shepherd's right hand.

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VOjiRgx.jpeg

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"My hovercraft is full of eels!" - Hungarian tourist
I am Dan Quayle of the Romans.
I want to tattoo a map of the Netherlands on my nether lands.
Heja Sverige!!
Everyone should cuffawkle more.
The wrench is your friend. :bat:

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The gunbunny leaps on her bike and roars off into the busy night traffic of San Francisco. The infiltrator and I hop onto his crotch rocket motorcycle, and in a fit of sheer genius, I command my spirit of air to use his last remaining task owed to speed us up with the Movement power.

The bike, a Thundercloud Contrail, has a speed of 6. The spirit rolls for the Movement power and gets 8 hits. Funny thing, that.

It was late and we needed some time to figure out what that result meant, so we broke for the night. Once I got home, I looked up the "Movement" power description again and did some math.

...If the critter meets the threshold in this test, multiply the hits by the vehicle’s Acceleration Rating and add the result to (or subtract it from) the vehicle’s Speed in the next Combat Turn, as if making an Acceleration or Deceleration Test.

Suzuki Mirage: Speed 6, Acceleration 3 Hits (8) *  Acceleration (3) = 24 24 + 6 = 30

I found that we had a small problem: http://i.imgur.com/fDwUDCb.png

I asked my friend Funranium, a physicist, to help me grasp what had just happened in real-world terms. His reply, paraphrased:

"I mean, being a hyperrelativistic muon soup could be a very rewarding roleplaying experience, but let's just imagine it's you and your motorcycle for the moment. From a human point a view, you instantaneously turn into a rapidly advancing ball of plasma shedding a rather lethal sheath of gamma radiation. Of course that radiation can't move faster than light either. Everyone around is dead from that momentarily before your FIRE OF ANNIHILATION consumes them and the rest of San Francisco. Look at the map, figure out which direction you were facing, and then, in three dimensional space, draw a straight line from this point to the horizon and into space because you will obliterate everything along this line in a 15-degree cone. You are a plasma jet carrying all the unfortunate matter that was in your way to make a new ring around Earth. The good news is that you probably don't trigger nuclear winter, but you have sterilized a good chunk of central California and Nevada with your gamma bath."

"Unless, of course, you hit the Sierra Nevada before you hit orbit. Let's say, for the sake of interest, you had a 300kg bike and you weighed 70kg. You, alone, are a ~8000MT nuclear bomb, focused due east. Welcome to nuclear winter. You remove Yosemite in an incandescent cloud. Molten silica sets off firestorms across the earth. You are a geologic event comparable to the K/T boundary or the Deccan Traps supervolcano eruption. Life will persist, it always does, but it may be a while until sentient life happens again to understand what you did with your motorcycle."

"Also, you will leave an interesting radiation signature in the rocks."

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"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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And for further amusements from the depths of Shadowrun related Reddit...

Scales of Player Behaviour and Play:

A Black Trenchcoat game will have a contortionist slip through the vents while the decker silences the alarms and spoofs camera feeds, lift the prototype from the safe, and carefully re-set all the defences as they leave so nobody ever knows they were there.
Black trenchcoats are slick, silent, and three steps ahead of their competition. Think Burn Notice and Inside Man.

A Pink Mohawk game will have the PCs kick down the door, lay out all the security with a rubber bullet minigun, blow up the server with the camera footage, and steal the entire safe by chaining it to a helicopter.
Pink Mohawk is fast, loud, and flashy, and works because people are usually too stunned to react in time. Think The A Team and Hotline Miami.

Mirrorshades is basically halfway between these - they try and keep things on the down-low, but are willing to go loud as a backup plan.
Think Ocean's Eleven or Human Target.

"Cuius testiculos habeas, habeas cardia et cerebellum."

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